SIMP Paid Her Bills On FIRST DATE?! Feminist Until The Check Comes?! | Dating Talk #120

Date: 2023-11-22

Duration: 6h 45m

Guests

Brian Atlas

CCeleste (DT120)>

NNicole (DT120)>

MMandy (DT120)>

OOxana (DT195)>

JJanna (DT120)>

TTessa (DT120)>

RRaina Zuzunaga (DT120)>

Identified Speakers

SPEAKER_02Nicole(guest)

SPEAKER_03Raina(guest)

SPEAKER_04Tessa(guest)

SPEAKER_05Tara(guest)

SPEAKER_06Mandy(guest)

SPEAKER_07TTS/Donations(audience)

SPEAKER_11Brian Atlas(host)

SPEAKER_12Oxana(guest)

SPEAKER_13Janna(guest)

SPEAKER_14Celeste(guest)

Key Moments

QuoteBrian introduces himself as representative of the patriarchy and proclaims men have fewer rights than women.

“men have less rights than women and that is an inescapable fact feminism has failed you how can the patriarchy help you today I am the official representative of the patriarchy”

QuoteOxana (matchmaker) argues that a woman can either build or crush her man through how she handles herself with him; gratitude helps man grow.

“woman always builds man with the right way she handles herself with the man she can either build her man or Crush her man”

ControversyTessa challenges Nicole on the contradiction between calling herself a feminist while wanting a full male provider who pays for everything.

“the two they can they can be parallel so then can I ask you something real quick”

QuoteNicole rates herself a 10 on looks.

“um I'd say 10 yeah there's always been for PR shirt but like I think I'm cute”

QuoteBrian self-rates at 5 due to recent weight gain (down from 6).

“I used to say I'm a six I think now I'm a five because I've gained some weight”

ControversyTessa tells Nicole she came on the podcast undereducated, was back-and-forth and confused, and should think more about what she actually wants.

“I think you definitely came on the podcast today very uneducated um I think you were very back and forth”

QuoteBrian plays Andrew Tate clip arguing men working dangerous jobs do so to provide for their families, not to oppress women.

“when a man gets up at 4 in the morning to go carry garbage to earn a good wage he ain't thinking I'm going to do this so I can oppress that”

QuoteTessa describes meeting her current boyfriend who ambushed her with his entire family on the first Tinder date.

“his whole family including Brothers sisters grandfather grandmother they all”

QuoteBrian asks guests to rate themselves 1-10 on looks.

“starting with you and we'll go around the table go ahead Cece”

Topics Discussed

Introductions & relationship status

Guests introduce themselves; relationship statuses revealed. Mandy is in an exclusive situationship since July 4th (~6 months) but not officially in a relationship.

Who should pay on the first date

Discussion on whether men should pay on first dates. Nicole wants provider; Celeste says whoever initiates; Mandy says situation-dependent. Brian argues against feminist who wants both equal pay and traditional treatment.

Feminism and traditional values contradiction

Nicole identifies as feminist but wants provider husband, traditional gender roles, to be stay-at-home wife. Brian and Tessa challenge the contradiction. Wage gap data presented (payscale, Pew Research).

Patriarchy discussion

Guests define and debate the patriarchy. Nicole claims patriarchy exists as male leadership. Brian rejects it, argues gynocentric society. Janna gives Slavic example of abandoned mothers.

Wage gap data presentation

Nick pulls up PayScale controlled vs uncontrolled wage gap charts, Pew Research Center data on young women's earnings, GDP per capita vs median male income, working hours comparison. Discussion of film industry pay disparities.

Andrew Tate clip - men as providers

Clip of Andrew Tate explaining that men working dangerous/dirty jobs do so to provide for family, not to oppress women. All guests react positively.

Roster / dating multiple people

Going around the table: who has had a roster. Celeste: not now (3 people at ~17-18). Nicole: no. Mandy: situationship (quasi-single). Oxana: had roster before husband. Janna: never hookups or one-night stands. Tara: open relationship dating. Tessa: no. Raina: pursued by multiple but no crossover.

Older men dating younger women

Brian presents list of reasons older men prefer younger women (not manipulation). Mandy raises concern that older men manipulate young women. Brian rejects pathologizing of male preferences.

Sugar daddy discussion

Nicole mentions sugar daddy thing traumatizes women; alludes to personal experience but refuses to elaborate. Brian notes women actively seek sugar daddies via apps like Seeking Arrangements.

Self-ratings (1-10 looks)

Guests rate themselves on looks 1-10. Celeste: 10. Nicole: 8 (said 10 initially, walked back). Mandy: 7.5 (8 with humor). Oxana: declined. Janna: 7. Tara: 6-7. Tessa: 3. Raina: 6. Brian: 5 (down from 6 due to weight gain).

What is a woman / transgender debate

Going around table: Celeste says biological woman. Nicole says fine with trans identifying as woman. Mandy says identifies as woman = woman. Oxana: woman is love/care/nurture. Janna: feminine energy, given to you. Tara: open relationship. Tessa: biological only, cites God not making mistakes. Raina: biblical gender differences.

Body count discussion

Body counts: Nicole <5 (declined to specify); Mandy under 20; Oxana declined; Janna <10; Tara: 11; Tessa: 0; Raina: 0. Brian: 11. Discussion on whether body count matters.

Transcript

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Tarathe what cam did I say it right I don't know I don't think so not yet um but yeah I I would say yeah I'm open to all types

Tarait's just I've always kind of like I don't know trended back toward Asian men um have you dated black

Brian Atlasmen I've dated one one white white guys Latino men I've

Taradated three of which white latino man uh okay so in order from like most to least uh with the Asian guys probably about

Taraseven or eight with white guys probably like three black guys one Latin men zero

Brian Atlasokay all right now you said you've dated like eight Asian guys yeah okay and

Taraso break down the ethnicity I guess all the ones you named so all of them except cuz it could have been like three um

TaraKorean dudes it could have been three Filipinos so so uh Vietnamese uh two two

TaraChinese uh two or three Korean okay um and then now do you consider Indian

Taramen Asian uh I think they're attractive but I don't consider them the same only

Tarabecause like that's fine Asian men have said that to me so I'm like okay you know if if y'all say that you're not the

Brian Atlassame then okay you know I okay respect that um now okay you said that you've been in three love triangles involving

TaraAsian men yeah what do you mean how so what does that mean um like you're dating multiple Asian men at the same time no no it happened at different

TTS/Donationstimes where um um so when I oh hold on justy Blues donated $11.11 okasaka what would you say to

TTS/Donationssomeone who has almost given up on finding love how does your service reignite that

Oxanahope someone who has almost given up and find M how does he well yeah so I would uh find out first what is the reason of

Oxanauh why the person has given up on love so there is always uh The Way We Are The Way We react to things the way we act there is

Oxanaalways deep reason why it is happening so we got to look in the root what had caused that and so if the person does want to find love or does want to

Oxanaachieve anything doesn't matter if it is business or the relationship or whatever if they really truly want it we just look at the reason we help the person to get that um but yeah no matter what we

Oxanawant to achieve in life is absolutely uh absolutely possible if the desire is there so just got to look inside look at the route gotcha I'm going to I'm going

Brian Atlasto read two chats here while we have them cam H Arigato Brian hey cam H thank you man uh I think were you trying to trigger this as the Japanese voice unfortunately yeah I was uh not it was under the trigger but hey thank you man

Brian Atlasappreciate it good to see you in the chat uh I think I don't know if you were here last show but uh we missed you man thank you thank you very much appreciated Nick can you pull up twitch really quick guys go to twitch.tv/ whatever drop us a follow drop us a

Brian Atlasprime sub let me shout these people out maniacal thank for the prime uh super thank for the prime Peak to you thank for the prime Cronos thank you for the tier one Ripa thank for the prime Soldier thank for the Prime mandar thank

Brian Atlasfor the prime all right let's see oh and I have one more chat here um actually I'll come back to that one um your love

Taratriangle with the Asian men yeah so on the dating apps I specify that um I'm pretty much looking

Tarafor open relationship um and just something simple uh I'm not trying to rush into

Taraanything serious and so and so yeah I I pretty much open myself up to I guess triangles like love triangles um and and

Taraso yeah like I'll just I'll be dating a guy and if he has interest in someone

Taramic sorry um so yeah I'll be dating or talking to a guy and if he has interest in somebody else

Brian Atlasum yeah I mean it it happens well you said you were in three love triangles so three different ones when you say a love triangle does it mean you were dating two men at the same time cuz I think I

Taralove triangle there's are they somewhat related in a triangle no so when I said triangle I meant um like I'm interested

Tarain a guy and then the guy is like interested in someone else so he he's basically seeing two two girls oh okay yeah tryangle tryangle in that way but

TaraI'm not seeing I've never seen multiple guys at the same time but you said you're looking for an open relationship I am I don't get it explain that uh just because I don't I me I mean just the

Taraphysics of it alone like I don't physics yeah I mean just like for a woman physics well well yeah I mean for a woman it's like okay like I could say

Taralike yeah I you know I want to date other guys or whatever but I when I say physics I mean like just to having having that much sexual interaction and

Brian Atlasbeing just poke poke po like by multiple like no like no no no no it's true it's true fair enough fair enough okay so you're saying it wasn't

Brian Atlasyou that was in the Triangle in so far as dating multiple people the men that you had been dating the Asian men you were dating they were dating other

Brian Atlaspeople too yeah okay interesting okay uh let's see what else you also said how Asian Customs American Standards of male attraction and being rejected based on those standards affects the mental

Tarahealth of Asian men is did you want to add a bit on that yeah so um going back to like um the study right and that

Tarabeing exposed and um you know them Asian men having trouble with dating um I I think it's due to a few different things

Taraum so so one thing is obviously like um cultural um cultural difference right

Tarabecause it's accustom for them to kind of um it's called like saving face is

Tarakind of what I've heard um from um a guy who is Chinese um basically like just kind of biting their tongue and um

Tarafitting in um and just kind of not really standing up for themselves um is how it could be perceived by American

Tarawomen but it's it's very common um in in their culture and so that's one thing I feel like kind of harms them uh and then

Taraalso the standards of attractiveness right is is also not it's very outside of what their body type is um I think

Brian Atlaswhat American women like um also just women rejecting them based on that right hold on I got an idea yo any Asian men watching the show

Brian Atlasright now send her a [ __ ] DM and by the end of the show we're going to see how many Asian men have dm'd her okay right your DMs are open for Asian men is that what that's right I mean you said you like

Brian AtlasAsian men might as well I've got like seven apps she's got seven you said 10 apps first off what are the you're said you're on an Asian dating app is that right what are they called of um have

Brian Atlasyou do you just like are you like a passport bra what what passport gal no have you been to any Asian countries mm

Brian AtlasI think we got our first passport gal she's you're what if that you know about passport BR maybe that was why it

Taracame here cuz it's wait what nothing no but you're like a passport gal you mean like I like foreign or

Brian Atlasexotic men is that what you mean well you like Asian men so I mean maybe that means Asian-American men well certainly it could mean that but also I mean if

Tarayou want to you could go to Japan oh so I'm not Korea China I'm not even going to lie like as soon as I touch down down here I opened up my Tinder like like I'm

Brian Atlasin Los Angeles it's I heard it was like more there a good amount good amount do you is there a way to uh unhinge I'm pretty sure do you pay for the premium

Taraso that you can select only matching with Asian men uh there's only three of the apps I'm actually paying for like the special features the other ones I'm not oh okay but but what of the apps

Brian Atlasthat you do pay for the special features and where it does allow you to filter by ethnicity do filter specifically for Asian men some apps don't allow it but the

Brian Atlasones that do yes okay so okay I see um and then you also wrote a portion of asian females should separate from Asian males so Asian men can be more

Taraaccessible to different races of women yeah I think they are doing that already though to be honest okay so okay so when I put that there I was kind of hoping

Tarathere would be certain guests here that you were hoping there'd be Asian women um well because there there was I guess like a couple girls in a previous previous podcast who like Asian women

Brian Atlaswho did not like Asian men and so that's why you wanted the you wanted Madison you wanted the SM I wanted the beef I really did oh [ __ ] yeah she's she's gone for uh Thanksgiving unfortunately uh but

Brian Atlasyes we have had some women well we could go around the table uh you guys any racial preferences when it comes to dating we'll go around the

Brian Atlastable starting with you I like everybody this girl okay here let me cuz there look there's some women that aren't attracted to Asian men all

Brian Atlasright there's women who aren't attracted to any any some women don't like white guys some women don't like uh Mexicans some I don't know why some women don't

Brian Atlaslike any race you could put any race do you have a race preference I like here I'll start I'll start just to maybe you guys Jesus Christ it's like

Brian Atlaspulling teeth I have a preference for white in Asian women how about that

TessaI could have guessed that though how I guessed that I like white an Asian don't get me wrong you're like that Meme where it's where are the white women have no [ __ ] idea what you're

Brian Atlastalking about but uh and get me listen but it's not like like I would date a black girl I would date a Latina girl it's not you know but do I have a preference in that in those two

Brian Atlasdirections yes I do go ahead white men okay there we go there we go all right I threw myself under the bus a little bit and now okay you prefer white men okay have you dated other

Brian Atlasraces yeah I've dated like Middle Eastern Middle Eastern asan are you what what's your ethnicity are you Latino or you I'm half Mexican half Spaniard okay got it um have you dated any uh Latinos

Celestein high school yeah a while back okay black guys one yeah Asian guys one I didn't date him but it was like you know a one night stand not a one night stand

Celestea two night stand situation a three night how many seven night stand I don't do night stands like well seven night stands so you met up with him yeah I saw him multiple times you had sexual

Nicoleintercourse with him yes I guess if you say oh my God bro okay it's okay go ahead I have a prefer for a provider but like racial preference no okay no racial pref you

Brian Atlashave a you have a provider preference okay I want to come back to that um provider preference okay um got it but

Nicoleno racial preference have you dated the Asian guy I've yeah I've dated around you know I don't have like a a specific preference okay I don't have a

Mandypreference no preference no what's your current boyfriend is oh my go gosh um he's black and

Brian Atlaswhite mix yeah okay uh your last boyfriend what was he was white your last boyfriend he was white your husband

Jannais white yes also Kazakhstan no he's American oh he's American okay what about you last boyfriend was Middle Eastern but living in Europe so Europe kind of European okay I see what about

Brian Atlasoh well we know your preferences what about you white white yeah white oh you said that you said that a little bit too enthusiastically Tessa is there

Tessasomething you want to tell us no I mean I like I have dated um white people other than white people other

Brian Atlasethnicities of like in high school okay as an adult did you hear how enthusiastic she was white people okay white white men I don't like

Tessawomen oh okay excuse me ex okay what about Asian women you well not not romantically but like just women in general are pretty dope but I'm just not romantical I see I see romantical uh

Rainawhat about you uh the last guy I did was white um okay but yeah I don't have a preference no preference okay all right so then that would would that

Brian Atlasstill kind of be like nobody's dat it I've definitely heard I well I definitely think it's the case that I think a lot of women even if they aren't ready to admit it like I do

Brian Atlasthink it's the case that and I've heard it from them like they say yeah I just don't find Asian men attractive they say that not me I didn't say that I think they're I find support you too because I

Jannafind Asian men attractive and uh I think that they have also all these Family Values R people yeah so yeah I I understand what

Jannawhy you like them so you find you find things attractive about them but have you have you dated no I haven't but I had acquaintances during my University

Jannayears so uh after Asian men uh stop being too shy and get used a little bit to like mates you know University mates

Jannathey show usually very caring Behavior they are nice friends you know they're very good in friendship and deep friendship so but they're shy sometimes and yeah and that that kind of goes back

Tarato what I was saying is that um I think that's a cultural custom um you know them just kind of like you know being

Tarareserved to to for the purpose of getting along and blending in um but yeah I think they also show masculinity in a different way so they may not be

Taralike outspoken or vocal but then they'll be like like the provider or um yeah uh family oriented and so so I I think they

Taraare attractive and you know show masculine trait they just show it in a different way in actions usually no words but more actions and then just last thing from our notes here for you you said success and challenges of or

Brian Atlasyou wanted to talk about success and challenges of transitioning from adult industry to professional work environment so you said you used to dance were you doing anything else uh so

TaraI escorting no um nothing like only escorting no sugar daddies sugar daddies

Tarabe honest okay uh so just the dancing right uh transition from like dancing to

Tarabartending to okay um you know taking some of that money and um going back to school and um you know getting my my

Taranursing license and so and so yeah I've like transitioned from different like OCC patience and um you know it's been a lot of emotions along the way because

TaraI'm having to pretty much involved in each step right and so um so since I got my license I have not

Taradone I I've literally only worked at one place that was um nursing related and then I went right back to bartending and

TaraI've been struggling um just trying trying to um I guess be confident in of myself right cuz you know going from B

Rainahere I'm sorry we just have to move on go ahead I'm what about you uh about the singleness question yeah yeah singleness she said you've been single for 6 months yeah uh not dating anyone

Brian Atlasnot seeing anyone abstinent oh abstinent mhm celibate mhm have you always been celibate yes always always oh so are you

Brian Atlasyou're a virgin yes I am oh so you're waiting till marriage yes I am okay all right and you're a Christian um let me see my notes Here uh where did it go sorry hold on uh wait did you send us

Brian Atlasnotes M hold on it's lost here I can't find it one sec oh Raina okay uh let's see uh you

Brian Atlasokay dating as a Christian um okay we'll we'll come to that later um now is it you just haven't found the

Brian Atlasright guy or you just are 100% like I'm waiting until marriage before having sex it's yeah it's a requirement the guy has to have the same moral standard in that

Brian Atlastoo sure um I don't even like entertain a guy that hold that I see okay oh so we're not talking uh this isn't like even born again vir like never had sex

Rainano someone who like wouldn't hold that same standard like when I I mean for you like are you're not a cuz some people claim like born again virgin but you've just never no I'm a I'm a virgin okay

Mandycool there you go anybody else here a virgin besides Nick damn it's a good

Jannathing he's waiting for the right girl he's waiting for the right girl we already matched then yeah she's right here oh there you go oh well Nick has a girlfriend so yeah so he has high standards what

Brian Atlassorry sorry sorry sorry I'm just kidding Nick doesn't have okay um so what damn sorry Dam dam God damn here let me do a couple I'm going to do a couple chats then I've got some some crucial

Brian Atlasquestions coming up some mind breaking questions that will be interesting okay Mike deester went from episode 100 to one at one today and Brian let me tell

Brian Atlasyou man you're so much better now than then great job man keep it up uh hey dude thank you man yeah uh you know we've done over this is episode 120 uh

Brian Atlasstill not where I want to be you know I obviously like to be uh a little little quicker on the uptake and sometimes I could articulate my thoughts a little better and sometimes I stutter and whatnot but uh thank you man just trying

Brian Atlasto improve little by little thank you thank you thank you and then we have here hold on let me pull up these chats over here we have uh here let me pull this one up this came in a while ago

Brian AtlasDerek the trader question for the ladies can you name three things you are willing to give up to obtain and retain the man of your

Brian Atlasdreams let's start with you go ahead three things you are willing to give

Brian Atlasup I don't think I necessarily do anything bad I'd be willing to give up like in which sense like I'll list a couple and if this resonates with anybody so for example example doing

Brian Atlasonly fans doing uh going out to bars clubs parties drinking maybe even posting

Brian Atlasprovocative photos on an Instagram uh what are some other things uh I mean to me this is almost obvious

Brian Atlaslike it's almost uh it should be default but not being promiscuous let me ask you would you

Nicolewould you Instagram or a husband husband um well considering I'd have to

Nicolelimit myself in certain ways or like that just seems like kind of a controlling aspect so I don't know if I'd consider him the man of my dreams if he were asking me to abstain from certain things although there are like

Brian Atlaspromiscuity like you mentioned or like a bikini picture like sure but I don't think that'd be the man of my dreams really abstaining from when you said abstaining from certain things and that

Brian Atlasbeing controlling what do you what specific things would you view as that would fall under controlling oh like just saying like you can't do so and so such as give us an example like what you

Brian Atlasjust said what you just listed like all like going out to clubs and parties and bars yeah what about having an only fans well that's sure I don't do you is that controlling though for a guy to not want

Nicolehis girl to no continue or stard and only fans I just think that wouldn't probably be the man of the person's dreams

Nicoleprobably if he was going of your dreams of my dreams personally I don't have one so it's not really like something you don't have what an only fan so I wouldn't have a problem with that no but

Brian Atlasso for you specifically what what things would you view as controlling just having me not like like the things you mentioned like

Brian AtlasI just wouldn't be the man of my dreams if he was trying to not have me do certain things but which of the cuz I said stopp being stopping being promiscuous perhaps stopping an only

Brian Atlasfans my general view though is it's probably like it's I think it is generally speaking suboptimal to probably initiate dating someone who

Nicoledoes only fans but um that's fine um like I said you just probably wouldn't be the men of my dreams if he was TR what what spef

Nicolespefic things would would it be why don't do much that's like out of bounds or like whatever like I'm not okay he didn't want you going out to

Brian Atlasbars and clubs and parties and drinking that's fine like if he'd be there like that's fine well because you said of the things I've listed that would be controlling but now you said now you're saying it's

Nicolefine so I feel like compromise and communication would make the difference I don't really know how to answer the question other than like but you you specifically said it would be controlling what which of the ones that

Brian AtlasI listed do you consider to be

Nicolecontrolling um controlling like if I just um if he's really just like limiting like I don't know limiting how limit how how would

Brian Atlascan you try to articulate specifically what's a guy could do that you would view that as controlling like prohibiting your friendships or who you could see oh okay

Nicoleso for example like he didn't want you hanging out with an ex-boyfriend or male friends oh no well I respect that and I would not find that controlling so of of course there's like compromises and communicating and like all that but I

Nicoledon't know um okay I just think like an overbearing controlling or like you cannot do this but do what articulate what thing like like um like say maybe you had an only fans in the past or something and

Nicolelike you just like communicate basically through it but I don't know I'm just I'm kind of done with this question like well I'm trying to get a straight answer

Brian Atlasout of you um man of my dreams communicate like communicate okay um here so the the original question was can you name three things you're willing

Brian Atlasto give up to obtain and retain the man of your dreams oh clubbing because I don't really do that

Nicoleum maybe bikini pictures um okay sure yeah what about you um would you give up your Instagram and your o and your God damn clubbing you didn't even

Mandylet me in okay go ahead maybe there's other things you can think of uh I mean like the last time I was on I said how I gave up my only fans but [ __ ] me over am I allowed to cuss yeah yeah that's

Mandyfine okay I messed me up and what messed you up he [ __ ] me over I don't want to cuss um but yeah uh I would give up my only fans yeah okay um I would give outg

Mandygoing to the club and cap cap cap cap I told you I have I have I deleted I deleted my only fans and then a week later like you have a

Mandyweek after you delete it you have a week to if you want to restart it again if you like change your mind after that week I found out he was cheating on me with like multiple women and I started my stuff again good times very good

Brian Atlastimes uh third thing I don't know I don't know just anything I don't know go ahead three things assuming you like if maybe

Oxanaif I was single so uh if he is the man of my dreams then it is accurate assum that I'm a woman of his dreams so if we

Oxanaare together then we would be discussing what we need to give up for our mutual growth and mutual benefit so whatever it

Oxanais we're thinking about us so it doesn't have to be three things could be million things you know okay MH yeah I think I can I could give up everything that

Jannawould hurt his feelings uh if he would explain it to me and said yeah for example I never met my ex after we broke up for example but if

Jannahe would have asked me uh no I would not see them what about you I would give up U

Taraor give him my womb if he's the right guy because I've protected my womb so much um and have

Tarawaited to get kid you know have kids um so I'd be willing to have kids if you wanted

Brian Atlasto okay um what about you um let's pull up her Instagram for example my Instagram your Instagram oh

Brian Atlasyeah yeah like let's say your boyfriend was like Tessa I want this photo and this photo and this photo down would you be down for it or would you yeah I'd

Tessahave him explain it um obviously and I would expect mutual respect where I could do the same thing with him and be like hey you know I'm not really feeling this photo on your Instagram you're

Tessagetting a lot of go ahead Nick um you know scroll down scroll down if he was like even that top one he took it and he told me he wanted me to post

Tessait oh he's fine with it yes squirrel back like this you know maybe the bikini one he he's in those as well once you scroll past them he's in it scroll back up scroll back up

TessaNick uh by the way the tattoo what's that say shame it says shame yes I'm I'm actually curious on that what uh can you what what's the origin story there um I

Tessaused to struggle a lot with my appearance uh growing up in Santa Barbara and um wearing Pearl snaps and boots and belt buckles is a very odd

Tessathing especially going to Santa Barbara High School um you know it's being the weird horse girl um I felt very shame I I felt a lot of Shame about it I didn't

Tessalike where I came from I didn't like you know um that I was the girl with the chickens or you know things like that um and I got it when I was about that to

Tessawhen I was about 17 and I just came to the conclusion where I was like I have that on my body you know now obviously for the rest of my life and when I look at it I remember those times

Tessaand it just kind of reminds me to get the get the [ __ ] over it you know what I mean I'm going to dress how I want I'm going to look how I want I'm going to act how I want and I'm not going to feel shameful about it okay there you go uh

Rainado you have an answer to this question um not necessarily I guess the biggest thing that that I've like I guess dealt with in my past relationships is I have I'm like friends

Rainawith guys and okay like that's yeah like if I'm with you like and you don't feel comfortable with me hanging out with a guy friend then like yeah you're like the number one person in my life I don't

Brian Atlasreally mind that valid valid we have beaten cheeks here what have I missed just got back from columia and I see this disappointing panel looking of women not even Colombian women are hard up on getting a green card as these

Brian AtlasEastern European gals do better okay from that's from bead and cheeks thank you man appreciate it uh we have we have what did he say he's being

Oxanarude Don John uh lady in blue how did you meet your husband uh he actually he was a client of my service I was not the Matchmaker

Oxanaworking with him otherwise he would be married to someone else if it was me uh but he was uh working with one of our

Oxanamatchmakers when his program ended MH we went out on a date and um yeah so the results are pretty much

Brian Atlasguaranteed right I mean delivered yeah he was a client now he has a wife so all good right there you go there you go okay let's see I had some notes here oh

Brian AtlasI wanted to come back to when we were going around the table about uh racial preferences you said that your preference is for provider mhm yeah now

Nicolehow does that look to you um I think like Financial stability like

Nicoleproviding Financial benefits and um I think like adding um just like a lifestyle like a maintenance of a

Nicolelifestyle yeah how so um like I want to look good so like you know maybe some like fashion money so I'm like you know keep my hair done my nails in your marriage or just if

Brian Atlasyou're just dating the guy I think dating and then leading to marriage yeah sure how how early on would you say you'd want a guy to start providing are

Brian Atlasyou talking like an allowance type of thing like you want an allowance yeah I think that'd be kind of nice okay have you had that with previous Partners mhm well you said okay you were been single

Brian Atlasfor 3 years you were in a three-year relationship in your three-year relationship did you have that well I was provided for yeah by the guy mhm uh how old was the guy well we were

Brian Atlasyoung we were like well you must have been high school like early college oh okay so maybe 17 to 20 yeah okay so so he was the same age as you yeah okay so

Nicolehe was 17 to 20 and he was providing for you yeah what was the allowance looking like oh it's just like wanted something yeah he' pay for it well would he give you

Nicolecash for you to pay for it did he give you his card how did it look um well I wasn't like asking for too much and I could kind of you know like I was I work

Nicoleand I take care of myself um but just like for like a now stance um yeah it' be nice to for for now stance but back then you said he

Brian Atlaswas providing for you to some degree um so I mean what would that look like was he paying for all the dates like if you guys went out to go food get food for example mhm yeah he'd pay for all the

Brian Atlasdates yeah okay would he buy you gifts uhhuh yeah he would sounded like if you wanted to get your nails done would he

Brian Atlasdo that yeah anything else that I'm missing other things not really know trips yeah trips how often would you go on trips not very often but like maybe

Brian Atlaslike once a year twice a year can we get this girl an energy drink please um yes please actually go ahead get her not one of the mood ones though the get the F the I don't know what we have make sure

Tarait's not the mood one though that one's like for sleeping and [ __ ] huh get her a cup too pour it in a cup um you want some nectar that drink NE there no that's a Selzer um I

Brian Atlasmean uh okay so he would take you on trips so how much like in a month do you think your boyfriend who is your same age was uh

Nicolespending on you like a th000 bucks a month maybe um I'd say maybe a little bit less than that probably around that um if you had the

Nicoleestimate 700 500 500 to like 800 typically but I wasn't really like doing too much at the time or asking for too much at the time like I said but he was spending on the low end he was spending

Brian Atlaslet's say 500 a month I'd say yeah okay and you were dating him for three years hold on doing my math here so that's 6 thou that's

Brian Atlas6,000 a year time three that's $118,000 over the course of the relationship that he spent on you I would say I lived with his family so his family was partially

Nicolelike also helping me out at the time like so it was you lived with his family mhm from the start of the relationship or at what point uh like towards the end

Brian Atlastowards the end yeah that's fine but he was well okay I mean in any case money originating from his household was being spent on you

Brian Atlasyeah but I also had a job so I would also you know would also what spend on him or no yeah like I'd get him gifts and stuff and yeah like okay yeah I'd say pretty

Brian Atlasimp I I think that's frankly pretty impressive for an 18 to 20 yearold to be spending that amount of money on a girlfriend at at that age um so but you

Brian Atlassaid moving forward though you said that you want a provider you'd want all that and more even mhm okay so first date the guy should I assume you the guy should

Brian Atlaspay for the first date and all future dates pretty much or I would prefer yeah you'd prefer okay and then what what are the other things that you would like and you want these pretty much from the

TTS/Donationsgecko correct um yeah like a guy to start taking care of you yeah I do earn money on my own sorry hold on just one

TTS/DonationsMotorsports donated $100 Brian I did not realize we had any hookers on this show yet here one is ladies do you consider yourself a

Brian Atlasfeminist and how has feminism failed you wow um we can go we'll go around the table on that and then we'll come back to the provider thing so do you consider yourself a

Nicolefeminist no yes in the way of like making sure women have equal rights there are like there's a lot of polarization and like

Nicoleradicalism within feminism especially like um seen recently and like um but yes a feminist okay you so you do

Brian Atlasconsider yourself a feminist and you want equal equality between and that's is it just with

Brian Atlasrights yes okay what about what about just like Society too yeah you want equality

Nicolesocietally yes gender what about gender roles gender roles I value traditional gender roles person sure we'll come back to that go ahead do you consider

Mandyyourself a feminist I don't but you know just definitely like you know support the people who are feminists are like equal rights for everyone um cuz that's

Oxanawhat feminism is about but is it word yeah femin not sure about that but okay go ahead uh no I praise man uh feminism

Jannakills man and it's I don't consider myself a feminist I and person me personally I don't feel

Tarathat my rights were limited or something like that but I yes that's awesome I'm not a feminist but I I I

Tarathink it's a lot of a fake feminist is kind of sure I don't know if there's a what about you that no not a feminist

Brian Atlaswhat about what about you no not at all not Fe okay wow okay I did I was hoping we'd have a few more you're a little outnumbered here but um so you consider yourself a feminist but and in your

Brian Atlaspre-show notes and what you've just kind of talked about here you said that you appreciate Traditional Values so how do you you consider yourself a feminist how do you reconcile

Brian Atlasbeing a feminist but also wanting to it sounds like to me holding men to their traditional gender roles how do you reconcile that not every woman lives a

Nicolesame lifestyle so I think it's important that they have representation and you know say in the matter of how they go about business and that there's equality in the pay equality in vote equality and like and also

Nicoleum um like minimization of sexism as well as like um what is it like harassment in the

Brian Atlaswork industry you know that's thing but okay you said minimization of sexism mhm don't you think it's a rather sexist position to believe that men should be providers I think that's like a

Brian Atlastraditional thing but isn't it it to some degree if that's your if you have a expectation on men by virtue of their

Brian Atlasgender to be providers isn't that sexist why can't like why aren't women capable of equally contributing to a

Nicolerelationship or marriage well I think they can be and I I would contributing to my household as well but I would just personally like to have a person who that would like to provide for me um I

Brian Atlasdon't really that's traditional gender roles how does that again how you reconcile being a feminist but wanting traditional treatment from men wanting men to pay for first dats wanting and it

Brian Atlasit's like I hear from a lot of women who say I want the guy to pay for the first date but after that I'm kind of okay actually if we maybe trade off paying on dates and uh but it sounds like for you

Brian Atlasyou want immediately throughout the entire the relationship you want a guy to provide for you you want traditional treatment and it sounds like you want him to pay for your pay your bills you want an allowance you want him to pay for your nails if you go on trips you

Brian Atlaswant him to pay for it probably if you guys were living if you guys were living together would you want him to pay the entire rent yeah okay you had something go ahead um I'm GNA use I feel statements

Tessahere um speak with your chess go ahead I think what I'm hearing from you is that you'd prefer to keep the money

Tessathat you have to yourself and have your husband provide um for children you whatever um what I see in that is exactly what was brought up earlier about divorce how men are in a worse

Tessaposition than women when it comes to things like that in marriage um I feel like that's kind of where that was set up where the women are going to leave um

Tessathey're going to have the money they're going to have all this stuff you know and even when you were just saying um yes I would like someone to pay for

Tessaeverything pay for my bills pay for my house it was like oh this uh like yeah I would love that but in our reality

Tessathat's it's you're very contradicting when you speak about these things um you know you say that you know you're a feminist women should have equal rights

Tessaif women are having equal rights they would be paying 50% of a bill on a date they would be paying a certain percentage and I understand you know um when I was in a relationship where I was splitting rent um I paid a little bit

Tessaless rent because I made a couple dollars less than him but it was still uh in our you know in our thinking it was still a 50/50 across the board uh he would go buy dog food one week the next

Tessaweek I would go buy dog food um so I just feel like that is a setup for the man where you can get out of it whenever you'd like but the man's going to be [ __ ] over in the end that's what I see

Nicolefrom it okay I see what you're saying and I don't mean to like come off as if I wouldn't be contributing anything financially like I'd be happy to also pay for like trips or like it's hold on

Brian Atlasdon't walk it back though that's no but that's what I meant that's how it well okay I mean that's what I me but you said in your past relationship the three-year relationship even a man who

Brian Atlasis your own age and you were young so I mean he I don't think 18-year-olds are exactly like 18 especially 18year old old men are not balling out I mean I don't know if he came from

Brian Atlasa wealthy family or whatever but it sound you said he was paying $500 a month to and you were living with him so you're living rentree I know it his parents house but uh for a period of the relationship but $500 a month for like

Brian Atlasan 18 19 20 year old that's a that's a lot of money that's $188,000 over the course of the relationship um yeah most I would argue like most 18 19 20y old men and women like you're earning

Brian Atlaspotential is exactly the same there's certainly first off I think the wage Gap has been debunked but there's there's no there's no case where uh an 18-year-old man is has more earning potential at 18

Brian Atlasthan an 18-year-old woman I'd actually say it's the reverse women have at a early at a young age women have certain opportunities I'm not even speaking necessarily sex work here I'm speaking like there's certain uh job

Brian Atlasopportunities for women that I think actually can pay more in that age range um but so okay here you you said but you you want Traditional Values

Brian Atlasso sounds like you you want the guy to be the provider um let me ask would you you want to get married one day I would like to yeah do you want to have kids okay um when you get married

Brian Atlaswill you take your husband's last name yes you'll take your his last name mm okay fair that's traditional you don't always hear that from from feminist um

Nicoleis your husband the head of the household yes but I do also

Brian Atlasum uh yeah yeah he'd be the head of that so okay all right um will you cook and clean yes okay do you want to be oh well

Nicoledo you want to be a stay-at-home life well yes that's um kind of what I'm hoping for because I also have like my projects like I'm like I write poetry so I'm an author and then I have my art projects and those are things that I can

Nicoledo from home as well it's like I'm a caretaker so I'm already nurt like my grandmother on a daily basis okay yeah so okay all right how strongly do you

Nicoleconsider yourself to be a feminist well that's the thing is there's a lot of polarization but I very much value like the the independence of women and women having their own rights and all that

Brian Atlaswomen having their rights and to be do do you think women say for example here in the United States uh what is a right that man that I as a man have that you as a

Nicolewoman does not we've seen a lot of um equality lately and that's what I mean like the polarization like things um I guess just

Brian Atlasum equ like that you have that women well what you you said that you're fighting for women's rights what right do men have in this country that women

Nicoledo not I'm just supporting women's rights I should say which which one like all of them like making sure they stay intact how um but you already have yeah the

Nicolethat's I me like the polarization like yes I'm like a feminist but I'm not polarized to where we're already like super limited I think um like the me too movement that's great like making sure

Brian Atlaswomen are heard and valid you know stuff like that but so which right are you hoping to keep intact which right which right voting

Brian Atlasright um do you think two episodes ago there was a man saying vote and I was like which I which I disagree with which

Brian AtlasI disagree with um but I think it's I mean that's it's very very very unlikely that the 19th is amendment is going to

Brian Atlasbe repealed I'm aware that's not uh that's not politically what's the word for it uh tenable I I don't care if you're a Democrat democ well certainly

NicoleDemocrat Dem Democrat uh the Republicans are not going to repeal the 19th amendment I aware um another thing though is like

Nicolefeminism as in representation like in the in politics okay would be nice there's a lot of controversy with you know um like abortion and like the health maintenance of women and having

Brian Atlasaccessibility to certain things and I think that's something that women could okay so but it's not clear to me if we're doing a so typically when we're talking about equality equality with who

Brian Atlasequality with what and so when we're talking about women's rights we're comparing them to supposed men's rights so when you're talking about abortion uh men don't have men don't have any

Brian AtlasReproductive Rights at all so it's not clear to me if that's a really a woman's like a a a gender inequality in so far as since men don't have

TTS/Donationsany Reproductive Rights it's not clear if there's inequality there $100 fan freaking tastic horse girl there you go very well poetic in Justice

Brian Atlasmen have less rights than women and that is an inescapable fact feminism has failed you how can the patriarchy help you today I am the official representative of the patriarchy uh

Brian Atlaswelcome uh well okay I got a couple couple of questions um what do you think about equalizing the draft are you in favor of that sure you down to get drafted

Rainaum I think women have a lot of duties here but here World War I around the corner right I personally don't want to be drafted I think most women would not

Nicolewant to go to war saying Traditional Values in that aspect and like so we equality and stuff that's equality that would be patriarch right wait what about it exactly well speaking of the

Brian Atlaspatriarchy um going around the table oh we need uh we need paper towels uh sorry got a little spill here oh they I think

Brian Atlasthey're oh yeah right here here I'll grab it the patriarchy um going around the

Brian Atlastable uh do you believe in the patriarchy and if so uh what is it um I'm not too educated on the

Nicolepatriarchy to give my opinion so if you that's okay um well see you see there's like a polarization on every like aspect of

Brian Atlaspolitics but um I don't know really well you mentioned patriarchy so you must I assume you must I think believe in it when it comes to like Reproductive

NicoleRights and women um you know taking care of their body and their business I think women should have the say over that and have that protected over the patriarchy state

Brian Atlasdance which is mainly in politics um the men are having you know okay so we can get into abortion here in just a sec

Brian Atlasbut do you believe in the patriarchy yeah it's there okay and here well just really quick on the abortion thing then you probably want to say something on this

Brian Atlasum it's not clear like you do realize like there's actually I I could be I think the stats are there are more women who are pro-life than there are men who

Brian Atlasare pro-life like 50% of the pro-life movement is women so it's not clear to me if that's evidence of the patriarchy if 50% of women are against abortion I'm

Brian Atlasnot sure if that's evidence of a patriarchy okay I didn't not know that well there's a lot of I mean I think I don't know who maybe who hears pro-choice who's pro-life pro pro

Jannapro-choice who's pro-choice pro- life Pro Choice pro life pro life pro life let's say pro-choice but I would uh

Jannawant more women choose Pro lifee like Yeah by their choice you know oh being educated being supported and like okay

Brian Atlasmake their choice to Pro be pro life um well okay so let's go back to uh okay so what is the patriarchy

Nicoleum like in the workforce the value of men in um positions or having being higher regarded than women in my say

Brian Atlaslike what I mean what evidence do you have for that it's can can you expand on that point a little bit

Nicoleum I don't know I'm done with this question you can't be done more energy drink honestly didn't didn't you get a whole po more of it yeah well I mean I'm I'm just asking very

Brian Atlasbasic questions like so how is the patriarchy manifesting itself what is it you mentioned workplace so are you talking about I mean I'm not against men

Nicolelike men that's not I don't know into the mic please I'm not against men it's just like matriarchy patriarchy our society is currently like a m a

Brian Atlaspatriarchy like M what is but what is that what is a patriarchy male leadership we have male leadership so if we if we elected a

Brian Atlasfemale president would be would we be in a matriarchy technically yeah okay that's an interesting sense of what the typically I my sense of what but that's

Brian Atlasjust like that's just like okay so okay I have a couple questions on this

Brian Atlasso I reject that that there's a a patriarchy okay um I I don't really believe that we're living in the patriarchy if anything I think we live in the gynocentric society where I

Brian Atlasactually think women are elevated above men in a lot of ways perhaps there's a one there's the one percentage of men that that have the the pen ultimate or

Brian Atlasthe ultimate positions of authority and power and uh the most uh well-paying jobs but that also you have to look at

Brian Atlasthe other factors too while men occupy the top positions of of politics power wealth they also occupy the vast majority of the lowest positions in

Brian Atlassociety you look at homeless people for example that's 80% men now and then that stat actually shifts those the people who are homeless who are living rough so

Brian Atlasactually on the street because you can be homeless but have shelter have a car the men that you see on the street 90% of the time it's going to be a man who's who's uh living R I don't know if that's

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