The Officer Tatum DESTROYS Whatever Podcast?! | Dating Talk #107
Guests
Brian AtlasIdentified Speakers
Key Moments
“"I just recently found out that I was cheated on with a man... she cheated on me with a man... supposedly multiple men."”
“"I would rate myself as a seven but I was born with two uteruses so I count it twice... I have two cervixes, if I had a husband he could touch them both."”
“"I think they come from a very immature place, they come from a very broken place... the guy gave this young man such horrible advice about a woman and told him to go get a side chick."”
“"I had some cucumbers in the fridge, you think you could like prep them for me... I could tell by the chops on the cucumbers it was super begrudging... and that's when I knew."”
“"When I was in that relationship even though I was in love with him I felt the most disconnected from God and so I knew it was bad but I was like all of your feelings are just... ah."”
“"We like familiar things... what we find attractive and fun is those exciting adrenaline roller-coaster relationships... the nice guy that wants to go on a date is not clingy — he's treating you right — and that's what we find clingy."”
“"I feel as if like not all of us can be Brandon Tatum... I'm kind of the dude that gets divorced... it's kind of brutal self-assessment and self-reflection."”
“"When I would fly on an airplane by myself I would envision me and my wife traveling together... I would already think about what me and my wife are going to do, our children... if you want it and you see it you believe it in your heart you pursue it."”
“"You said in your pre-show messages 'why do men seek to date and marry girls way younger than them, look for partners your own age' — you recently dated a guy who was 44, a 14-year age gap."”
“"I am a foot person really... and my wife watching and she already know, she already know."”
Topics Discussed
Brian introduces show with streamlabs/merch/BLM plugs; mentions four scheduled guests bailed the night before claiming a mandatory Sunday landlord meeting. Guests introduce themselves: Karen/Serena (38, Bay Area, dental, bisexual), Eileen (24, ASU engineering student, was on Enamórate), Diana (40, real estate, won't marry), Yasica (27, OnlyFans), Julia (29, DC tech consultant, Christian), Claudia (34, neuropsychologist, 2 cervixes), Kate (24, pastry chef), Brandon Tatum (36, Officer Tatum YouTuber, ex-cop, married).
Full round of relationship statuses. Karen: single, just out of 4-yr lesbian relationship, ex cheated with men, now in a situationship. Eileen: single, last relationship 1.5 months (guy from Enamórate TV show). Diana: single 6 years, proposed to twice, sold both rings, doesn't want to get married, one adult son. Yasica: in 5-year relationship. Julia: single ~2 years, was in love with last boyfriend (non-Christian), last relationship ended Jan 2022. Claudia: single ~4 years, celibate. Kate: not fully captured. Brandon Tatum: happily married, wife changed name to Tatum legally.
Karen reveals her 4-year lesbian relationship ended when she discovered her girlfriend (who claimed to be fully lesbian) had been cheating with multiple men. The ex's former boyfriend (who she described as "obsessed" with her) had been visiting while Karen was out of town — visible on ring camera footage. Karen is bisexual; had prior relationships with men.
Diana says she finds most men trash. Discussion of why women reward bad boys and find nice/reliable men boring. Brandon Tatum calls for women to reflect on what they present to attract those men. Brian says men respond to women's incentive structure. Guest from psychologist background (Claudia) explains attachment theory and anxious/avoidant attachment styles as root cause of attraction to exciting/unavailable men. Brian argues women both complain about toxic men and reward them.
Discussion of who pays on first date, second date, moving forward. Brandon Tatum says he always pays and finds it disrespectful for women to contribute. Brian shares story of girlfriend who was reluctant to prep cucumbers for him while he was injured due to "feminist mind virus." Panel split: most women say guy should pay first date; some open to reciprocating later. Brief discussion of making sandwiches — none find it demeaning.
Discussion of whether women's careers/income make them more attractive to men. Brian argues generally no — men are not looking for providers. Diana lists her accomplishments (real estate, insurance broker license). Brandon Tatum says men look for peace, softness, support — not competing careers. Julia makes point that women must support themselves while single but then conflict with what men want. Claudia/psychologist notes there is value in intellectual compatibility.
Chat donor challenges Brandon Tatum for making "hit pieces" against Fresh & Fit while using similar talking points on a "red pill podcast." Brandon clarifies he is neither red pill nor green pill; his criticism of Fresh & Fit is that they come from a broken/immature place and give harmful advice (e.g., telling a young man to get a side chick). He disagrees with their demeaning approach to women. Brian says Whatever is not necessarily a red pill podcast and he brings on guests with different views.
Julia describes an ex who was "perfect" but lacked chemistry and she couldn't reciprocate his passion. Brandon Tatum argues the spark/click can be overrated and that mature love is practical; he and his wife didn't have a dramatic honeymoon spark. Brian questions why women chase the click when it has no bearing on a partner's long-term quality. Panel discusses whether chemistry can develop over time vs. needing to be instant. Julia mentions a 23-year-old crush she met on a Christian retreat.
Extended discussion centered on Julia's Christian faith and celibacy standard. Julia explains her conversion at 19, her standard of waiting until marriage, how she violated it with a non-Christian ex (January 2022 breakup), and her now-firm rule to only date practicing Christians. Brian challenges the consistency of a woman's new standard after prior sexual activity — men may feel scammed. Brandon Tatum gives nuanced view: Christian men should appreciate a woman genuinely trying, regardless of past. Discussion of pair bonding, body count as proxy for female selectivity, whether low-BC women bond more intensely.
Brian delivers extended monologue on hypergamy and dating app dynamics: top 5-10% of men get most female attention on apps; attractive men will sleep with average women but never commit; average women misread sexual access as being in that man's league; they then reject men actually on their level. Brian uses the "6 can get sex from an 8-9 but never commitment" framework. Panel partially agrees. Julia says the best strategy for a woman is not sleeping with a man quickly if she wants commitment.
Brian questions whether there is a meaningful difference between legal marriage and a committed monogamous life-partnership. Brian expresses a premonition that he would be the type to get divorced. Brandon Tatum pushes back: negative self-talk is the problem, and Brian should manifest a positive marriage instead. Claudia/panel argue marriage has religious, romantic, and social commitment value. Brian says it's pathetic that vows mean nothing in modern divorce culture.
Brian catches Julia in a contradiction: she messaged before the show saying "why do men seek to date women way younger — date your equal," but she recently dated a 44-year-old (14-year age gap) and has a crush on a 23-year-old (6 years younger). Julia acknowledges the irony. Brian and Brandon discuss how men are biologically attracted to women at peak fertility/physical attractiveness. Discussion of data showing women view 80-90% of men as unattractive; average age gap at marriage (~2 years). Brandon shares his wife wanted a man 10 years older but ended up with him (5 years younger).
Julia says she finds men showing emotions healthy and affirming. Brandon Tatum says he would never cry in front of his wife; he processes emotions privately or with male friends. Brian argues women lose attraction when men display weakness/vulnerability. Brandon distinguishes between vulnerability in appropriate settings vs. breaking down in front of a woman. Panel compares showing emotions in war/dangerous situations. Julia shares story of her father crying with her over her struggles being single at 29.
Quick self-ratings round (1-10, looks only). Karen: 8. Eileen: 9. Diana: 7. Yasica: 8. Julia: 6. Claudia: 7 (jokes "13" due to two cervixes). Kate: not clearly captured. Brandon Tatum: not asked (male guest). Body count round: Karen: 5. Diana: 50+. Julia: under 10. Claudia: 3 (less than her age). Eileen: significantly less than 24 (Brian jokes multiply by 3). Yasica: not clearly captured.