Broke Men Should NOT Date?! She HATES America?! Husband CRASHES Show! | Dating Talk #121
Date: 2023-11-27
Duration: 7h 17m
Guests
Brian AtlasIdentified Speakers
SPEAKER_02Kenderly Ryan(guest)
SPEAKER_03Abigail(guest)
SPEAKER_04Carla Elia (overlap)(guest)
SPEAKER_05Carla Elia(guest)
SPEAKER_06Monica (Swedish Bella)(guest)
SPEAKER_07Anna(guest)
SPEAKER_10Gloria Calderone(guest)
SPEAKER_11Mason Gregoire(guest)
SPEAKER_12Dustin (Carla's husband)(guest)
SPEAKER_13Brian Atlas(host)
SPEAKER_14Holly Treats(guest)
Key Moments
00:02:39
QuoteHolly Treats introduces herself as full-time content creator since 2015 including OnlyFans
“hi my name is Holly treats I'm 28 years old and I live in Los Angeles and I've been a full-time content creator since 2015”
00:03:02
QuoteCarla Elia introduces herself as relationship coach who went viral for controversial stance
“hello my name is Carla Eli I'm 23 years old and I'm a relationship coach and I live in San Diego”
00:03:38
QuoteKenderly Ryan introduces herself as adult film star of 14 years who now manages performers
“I'm kenderly Ryan um I am 32 years old I am from Los Angeles California and I I'm an adult film star of 14 years and I also now started managing lovely women”
01:45:10
QuoteMonica reveals her open marriage is only open for pegging
“the thing is he's not into it right into what the pegging part um wait is it you guys got an open marriage yes only for pegging”
03:59:00
ControversyKenderly's tweets read on air: 'white people don't have culture' and 'it's not racist for black women to humiliate white men'; she stands by both
“I still stand by that very strongly. It's not racist for black women to humiliate white men. That's how I feel. It's called reparations for your ancestors.”
04:48:12
QuoteHolly refuses to share body count saying she 'never reveals her secrets'
“Holly treats I've got I put a lot out there so there's plenty of find other than body count you should put a little more out there”
04:49:30
QuoteKenderly declines to give body count number but gives range: ~50 professional scenes + 50-100 private partners, sexually active since age 13
“I've done about 50 scenes and I've had about 50 to 100 private Partners okay I became sexually active at 13”
04:52:12
QuoteAbigail shares body count of ~14 and expresses regret about not respecting herself
“it's 28 I used to not have very good respect for myself when I was younger and I wish I would have gone back in Ma and hold my younger self respect yourself”
04:58:00
QuoteMonica shares body count of 25-30 and reveals it stemmed from seeking validation due to abusive mother
“probably between 25 and 30 like I'm 40 but also I was in a bad place when most of that happened I my mom was super abusive so I just tried to find love wherever I could”
04:59:00
QuoteKenderly says body count 8 then laughs it off
“eight I'm not so interesting okay”
04:59:42
QuoteMason (SPEAKER_11) reveals body count of zero as a 27-year-old virgin
“Mason oh yeah uh zero Z zero Z hand Z Henderson okay good for you”
05:05:06
QuoteCarla rates herself as 'average' to be relatable to her followers
“I was going to say that I was average too I think I'm I'm an average and just because if I'm average and I can get this life that I have then all the other ladies can have the same thing”
05:11:42
QuoteCarla states her position on broke men: absolute — broke men at 30+ should not be dating
“absolutely broke men like financially and mentally sure... if you're 31 40 and you're still broke there's something wrong with you”
05:14:42
QuoteCarla reveals she was a virgin before marriage, which explains her high standards stance
“she was a virgin before she met her husband so I think that's why they said it because they paid attention that she was a virgin before”
05:59:36
QuoteDustin (Carla's husband) introduces himself: ex-Navy, 25, aspiring police officer
“so tell us a little bit about yourself Dustin... I'm uh 25 uh just recently got out of the military... I've been in the process for going on to the police force for about a year now uh should be going in in January”
06:07:48
QuoteDustin describes household dynamic diplomatically when asked if he's under a dictatorship
“I do not think I'm under a dictatorship I I run my household okay uh she just makes the food and uh points me in the right direction”
06:10:30
QuoteDustin describes realizing Carla was different when she refused to hold his hand on first date
“I knew I knew this was a different breed of woman”
Topics Discussed
00:00:22
Introductions and relationship statuses
Guests introduce themselves: Holly Treats (28, LA, content creator/OnlyFans since 2015), Carla Elia (23, San Diego, relationship coach, viral for 'broke men' stance), Kenderly Ryan (32, LA, adult film star 14 years/manager), Abigail (22, Missouri, personal trainer), Monica Swedish Bella (40, Sweden/LA, bikini competitor/OnlyFans/former teacher), Anna (26, Ukraine, 4 years in USA, actress/ecommerce), Gloria Calderone (31, New York, real estate investor), Mason Gregoire (27, mech engineer/powerlifter/Christian). Relationship status round follows.
00:06:26
Relationship status and dating styles round
Holly: single, dating 3 men (2 long distance), recently had someone fall off her roster. Carla: married 1.5 years, virgin before marriage. Kenderly: single 5-6 months, female FWB situationship, also sleeping with 2 men currently. Abigail: single ~1 year, sees someone 6 months (on/off). Monica: married 6 years (slid into DMs). Anna: married, met 4 years ago, married 3 months after meeting. Gloria: married within 4 months of meeting. Mason: single, virgin saving for marriage.
00:27:00
Open relationships, polyamory, and Monica's pegging arrangement
Monica reveals her marriage has an open arrangement for pegging only. Discussion of what constitutes an open marriage and emotional vs physical boundaries.
03:59:00
Kenderly's controversial tweets about white people and America
Brian reads Kenderly's tweets: 'white people don't have culture' and 'it's not racist for black women to humiliate white men'. Kenderly stands by both statements. Group debate on cultural appropriation, double standards, and whether statements are racist. Kenderly says she's half-Mexican. Monica (Polish) and others push back.
04:24:00
Body count discussion and double standards
Brian asks everyone to share body count. Holly refuses. Kenderly gives range (~50 scenes + 50-100 private, sexually active since 13). Abigail: ~14 (by graduation, mostly from 2-month phase at 16-17; regrets it). Monica: 25-30 (most from period of seeking validation due to abusive mother). Gloria: declines (husband watching). Mason: 0. Anna: declines. Debate on double standards for male vs female body count, whether men with high counts can expect low counts, and whether hookup culture is harmful.
05:03:22
Self-ratings (looks 1-10)
Ratings round. Holly: 7 average, can dress to 10. Carla: average/5 (doesn't want to say 10 to be relatable to her followers). Kenderly: 5 appearance, 10 personality. Abigail: 6. Monica: 5 (self-described). Gloria: 8. Mason: 7.5-8. Brian: 5 (gained weight, downgraded from 6).
05:08:36
Carla's viral content reviewed — 'broke men shouldn't date'
Brian reviews Carla's news articles (New York Post, The Mirror, The Sun) and multiple TikTok videos. Carla explains her position: men with provider mindset should show their resources naturally; broke men at 30+ have limiting beliefs and should focus on finances first; women are precious investments. Discussion involves all guests on whether broke men should date/marry/have children. Carla advocates being a virgin and rotational dating without intimacy.
05:46:48
OKCupid attractiveness data and male/female rating disparities
Brian shows OKCupid chart: men rate women on a bell curve while women rate 80% of men as unattractive. Discussion of why women are harsher judges of male attractiveness and how this affects dating marketplace dynamics.
05:50:00
Dating logistics: men working 60-70 hours, submission, and love languages
Discussion of whether women can handle men working very long hours for high income. Monica says she needs her man at home. Carla says women should have their own life alongside a wealthy man. Love language discussion: Monica and Anna both say acts of service/cooking are how they express love to husbands. Brian and Mason discuss appreciating wives' cooking regardless of quality.
05:59:36
Husband Dustin crashes the show
Carla's husband Dustin (ex-Navy, 25, aspiring police officer) joins the panel mid-show. Describes meeting Carla on Bumble, first coffee date (she's allergic to alcohol), spontaneous Denny's and meeting her family. He showed her his finances/credit score/savings on third date. Says 'I knew this was a different breed of woman' when she refused to hold his hand on first date. Describes household as: 'I run it, she makes the food and points me in the right direction.'
06:08:00
Rotational dating debate
Brian and Carla debate rotational dating concept. Brian prefers undivided romantic attention immediately. Carla clarifies rotational dating means spending time with multiple men without intimacy or kissing. Dustin confirms he was fine with it because Carla was clearly not being promiscuous. Monica shares she had no idea how to date after an 11-year relationship ending and found long-distance courtship via Skype valuable.
06:39:00
Protective husband video (Carla's TikTok)
Brian plays Carla's TikTok about asking a man what he would do if a fight broke out — is he the type to pull out his phone or fix it? Dustin responds to the video about himself, saying he would assess the situation for his family's safety and take video evidence for police if appropriate. Carla says knowing her husband would protect the family is the most attractive thing.
Transcript
Page 7 of 8
05:43:06
Mason Gregoirethe same so so if she's a seven she will not give a five the time of day generally speaking um yeah that's a pretty good rule of thumb certainly for casual
05:43:17
Brian Atlassex casual hookups exactly exactly not for like relationship considering all the factors yeah so men can like in addition to just looks men can bring
05:43:28
Brian Atlasother things to the table Riz personality status uh wealth but so for casual sex women will T typically break
05:43:38
Brian Atlastheir rule for for who they will sleep with uh the guy has to be like really attractive yeah whereas it's almost the reverse for men they'll like sleep with
05:43:49
Brian Atlasa girl that they would never be in a relationship with uh but she's not going to be phys so what happens if it's the other way around though yeah what it happens but gener gen what do you mean
05:44:01
Holly Treatsif it's the other way around just asking I've slept with a lot of ugly guys but they had great dicks oh my gosh hurt my feelings I was like psycho texting him for years and this guy's not hot but he just like neged me at the right time at
05:44:14
Holly Treatsthe right age and all he yes men can make up like you know he a miracle situation sit there being like wow this guy's not attractive why does this hurt like why am I like this from this but so
05:44:24
Mason Gregoireyeah but what if what if what if the girl is just as hot and it's a hookup yeah that happens yeah but you know well so typically in that situation uh the
05:44:36
Mason Gregoirewoman will will push the guy away because she thinks I can obtain this caliber of man that's probably out of my
05:44:45
Mason Gregoirereach so say a seven gets with a seven M uh generally speaking since she is she has seen that men
05:44:55
Mason Gregoirewill reach down and have casual sex with somebody who is less attractive than them well it gives them the false self-confidence that I can get with
05:45:04
Mason Gregoiresomebody who's way above me in the attractiveness uh Arena also also do you think men get like that too or is that just women get like that like are you saying that's how men get or that's how
05:45:16
Holly Treatswomen get or that's how both get well that's how women get in particular okay so do men ever get dulu like that when they like say a guy like gets out of his League somehow and he like bags this girl who's like way out of his league is
05:45:29
Holly Treatsthat does that then make him a little dulu going like does that do you ever maybe not all guys but do you ever see guys like that or like oh yeah I'm a 10 now like does that ever happen with or is that I think most men get slapped in
05:45:39
Mason Gregoirethe face with reality typically when it to maybe it'll like he'll he'll be high on it for like a week or two but eventually it's going to be like ah yeah was just like a but yeah I do I do agree
05:45:50
Monica (Swedish Bella)with you women who like say two10 I'm not saying T but two7 they hook up and you know it's all fine and dandy but I do agree women will off yeah mhm
05:46:02
Holly Treatsand then no it's like you know once you've got that trophy as a woman um move on I don't trust a guy if he's too hot and I know men feel the exact same
05:46:13
Holly Treatsway about women but it it's same same parallel I don't trust a guy who's Too Hot just like how you don't trust a girl who's Too Hot well also there there's Nick there's actually they've done some data on this Nick if you're able to go
05:46:25
Brian Atlasinto the infographics folder it's um so men and women's assessment of Nick are you able
05:46:33
Brian Atlasto get it uh infographics tab uh oh I'm screwing this up on mine it's in the infographics tab it's OKC new
05:46:44
Brian Atlaschart um so men and women like perception of male attractiveness versus female attractiveness um men tend to rate women
05:46:54
Brian Atlason a bell curve whereas women are pretty harsh judges of uh male physical attractiveness go ahead Nick OKC new chart OKC OKC new chart
05:47:09
Brian AtlasI would like to respond to everything you said yeah yeah well I'll get you to come in here in just a sec you got the chart
05:47:19
Brian AtlasNick so percept perception of male attractiveness versus female attractiveness men as rated by women women as rated by men so women are very harsh judges of uh physical
05:47:32
Brian Atlasattractiveness so oh there's some other really good charts too but I don't there I don't have them saved um um oh so we either rate you a one or a
05:47:45
Brian Atlasfive where guys will rate the middle kind of is that what it's the bigger thing is that like most women find most men physically unattractive yeah where it's like you're either hot or you're not kind of like that's what that looks
05:47:57
Brian Atlaslike you basically like the vast majority of women think like I think it's something like 80% of men are unattractive and like the vast majority
05:48:05
Monica (Swedish Bella)of men will say that 80% of women are attractive yeah I think Tinder did a um study on that how many men's swipe um oh yeah it's only like the top five top 10%
05:48:19
Brian Atlasof men that are getting like all the attention on Tinder um oh man there's like some really good websites on this but I I can't recall what they are uh did you wanted to come in yeah so I want
05:48:31
Carla Eliato go ahead and start with the first thing that you mentioned about how you were telling this girl not that she that she wasn't a 10 out of 10 but I think that well when I first saw the video a lot of women that come they hated that
05:48:43
Carla Eliavideo I was getting dragged yes yes I was getting dragged and so to respond to that I think that they were the woman that said I'm a 10 out of 10 she was in survival mode she feels attacked in this in this space and I think we've made it
05:48:55
Carla Eliaa comfortable space for us to be real with both of you and with the audience that is watching so the first time that I saw that I was like oh my gosh and to be completely honest I didn't know what the whatever podcast was until that video and I was like oh my gosh this man
05:49:07
Carla Eliais like so rude with with telling her this and I was getting a lot of women kind of like coming up to me and telling me hey what do you think about this so I responded to that video without you know really knowing the show this was in August so I didn't know that Candace
05:49:18
Carla EliaOwens was going to be here Candace Owens I'm I'm like a fan and um I'll get you guys a link to and then um I'm such a huge fan of Candace Owens but anyway and then secondly I completely agree with
05:49:29
Carla Eliawhat you're saying about the dulu is a salul how that's like a new a new phrase being dulu is a Salu and I tell my ladies uh here we're we're we're smarter than that I actually built something called the list of Threes And I tell
05:49:41
Carla Eliathem to choose three qu three physical qualities in a man that they need not want need because I also agree with you that they're choosing like they're so focused on the physical aspect and that's why they get they they get what
05:49:54
Carla Eliathey get a lot of women that are not happy and I'm like you need to look past that what is his character and um I think that in response to that video I do agree with you all the way and that's why I'm telling my ladies St her up with
05:50:07
Brian Atlasdiscernment to be smarter that's nice all right here let me go to a couple chats we got some more things to react to Kyle Kelsey women don't want a guy working 60 to 70 hours and still making six figures know from experience no matter how well you treat them I know
05:50:19
Kenderly Ryanform experience what kind of form spreadsheet women can be very selfish though like it can happen where they don't like it but for me I would love a man that does that it depends like and there's a video where I made like are
05:50:31
Carla Eliayou capable of being with a wealthy man because a wealthy man is going to be working there's not and that's why I say women have your own life outside of the man so if you're the type to say I'm going to sacrifice some money to spend more time with a man go all for it quick
05:50:43
Monica (Swedish Bella)thing quick thing um I I know a lot of men who work like that and I would not be able to be with a man that works that much like I need my man at home I I want
05:50:53
Brian Atlasto love hug yeah I like I just don't please work from home if you're going to be working sure all right we have puffy biggest to every man on Earth if a woman asks you how much money she makes she
05:51:05
Brian Atlasmakes Le her and block her she does not like you no woman ever asked Chad and Tyrone these questions is that a Al the wow that was kind of racist but that's okay what
05:51:18
Holly Treatswhat was wait what was R he made a point to say Chad and Tyrone and not in that and that he's a black man just saying is he
05:51:27
Brian Atlassingle yeah uh wait puffy puffy yo are you still in the chat puffy she's she's single and ready to mingle I mean I'm only mingling so okay there you have it uh let's see or you're not well you got
05:51:40
Brian Atlasyour your lady friend um oh she'll join too if you want okay oh Puffy you got you want to three somebody if that's what you're puffy you want to threeesome okay my question is for directly for the woman saying broke men should not have children is it okay for somebody to say
05:51:52
Holly Treatsthat overweight women should not have children oh scientifically women should get more over a slightly more like 20 pounds more overweight to have children yeah can I speak on this since I am an
05:52:06
Kenderly Ryanoverweight woman that's not an argument it's it's not like for me like I should probably get a little bit healthier if I was to have a kid because I wasn't that healthy I wasn't eating correctly I was not taking care of my body so if I'm going to put a
05:52:17
Kenderly Ryanlife in my body I should probably know what I'm eating and putting into them so with that said I might be overweight but I could be eating really healthy so it just depends on your definition of overweight what do you mean like right now for instance I'm still overweight
05:52:30
Kenderly Ryanbut I don't eat carbs I don't eat sugars I don't eat anything processed so if I was to get pregnant right now which will never happen if I was to get pregnant my child would be really well fed and
05:52:40
Brian Atlasreally well hydrated and taken care of by my nourishment skills all right okay but I overweight I'm fat we bring the husband up I think we should bring the
05:52:49
Brian Atlashusband he's been waiting he's so excit patiently wait he's such a big fan we need to pull up another chair and then I think maybe what we do is if you scoot over that way and then we'll just put
05:53:01
Brian Atlasthe chair right next to her my legs are already in pain there's no we nobody in here mm hold on let me check if you chair chair what uh thin chair would be
05:53:11
Brian Atlasbest thin chair would be best good says okay hold up
05:53:21
Brian Atlasuh so uh what do you guys think about um collateralized debt obligations cdos what do you guys think about cdos
05:53:34
Brian Atlasyou know like when people get married and then they have to show sh it out what like what just no like you know the whole like financial crisis cdos coll collateralized debt
05:53:44
Holly Treatsobligations no what do you mean like what exact question there's something World of Warcraft related I wanted to ask but oh my gosh you can't just drop that on us but what is the
05:53:55
Brian Atlaswhat's the definition of collateral debt I was just being awkward while the world oh my gosh like ding is downstairs by he should he should be I'm asking feel bad for him he's probably freezing he
05:54:08
Monica (Swedish Bella)probably freezing his butt off sorry what's Dustin right Dustin yo Dustin I'm sorry dude so question if if anybody here would say I'm a 10 would you would you would you knock that down would you
05:54:20
Brian Atlasgo like hell no you're not a 10 bro put you in your place I would yes with spankies or just spankies yeah I would just say what do you mean no I'm just wonder I wouldn't rate the girl but I'd
05:54:32
Brian Atlassay no you're not of 10 that's it I'm not trying to be a dick about it but no you're not a 10 sorry is that your favorite line by chance what's my favorite line that you're not a 10 I've heard you say it more today than anyone else is there anyone that you've seen
05:54:45
Brian Atlasthat is a 10 like is there like one unicorn that's a 10 to you I don't think there's such thing as a 10 don't believe in t there's nines I guess there's nines um I feel like 10 is perfect you know nobody's perfect so I
05:54:57
Holly Treatshave a lot of eight a lot of people just like on a like religious basis don't believe in tens like like you know not real yeah well no it's just uh there there
05:55:10
Brian Atlascertainly have been women that I've seen that I'm like this woman is amongst the most exceptionally beautiful women I've ever seen there's that but you're never like that's the one0 I finally found her
05:55:23
Brian Atlasno find Details oh no sh trigger yeah they're perfect y some of those AI girls wasn't yeah some of the AI girls are
05:55:33
Holly Treatsunreal literally it's insane watch out and their Riz is soting so good their RZ is getting unhinged they're coming for you guys I have to
05:55:43
Kenderly Ryansay like Tom Cruz is a 10 Tom Cruz is a 10 he's a handsome guy but I don't know if he's a 10 isn't he like 5 fo4 he's 57 5 who's your 10 who's my 10 you don't
05:55:55
Kenderly Ryaneven want to know it's say it say who your 10 is it's controversial as say Pete Davidson uh it's worse than FR
05:56:04
Kenderly Ryanhe's cute he's cute frii she is she goes spring break whenever she's horny spr break spring break no I'm obsessed with
05:56:14
Holly TreatsSpring Breakers and J and it's like his ugliest role like James Franco is not hot in this role but for some reason yeah
05:56:24
Brian Atlaswait the husband approaches where is he I can't see I have say he is a 10 to he's warming up but uh yeah no
05:56:37
Brian Atlasoh maybe do you think if you're willing to uh just let them maybe share share the mics I think I think I think it's this yeah
05:56:48
Kenderly Ryanjust if you can share with him yeah no problem oh my gosh we're both wear oh are your the are just like oh I got those in pink too they're coming the
05:56:57
Kenderly Ryanblack Fridays oh my God Eli they're really cute did you see these on the site no I didn't I got 100 I paid 100 for them they went
05:57:09
Kenderly Ryanon sale for 6 I feel like I have more I guess while I wait I can see if I have any other notes oh no they're cross uh yeah they got heels on them like to cuz I'm trying to be your height that's why good luck I know I'm five too I'm like
05:57:21
Brian Atlashit me up there uh let me see okay so uh I'm trying to think um wait uh and maybe we'll get into some
05:57:33
Holly Treatsof these in the videos are you against 50/50 who here is against 50/50 like going 50/50 against it for certain people but for me I won't I won't do it thanks Nick
05:57:44
Kenderly Ryanfin yes 50/50 against it yeah I'm against it okay yeah I'm against I'm like I'm for and against okay yeah I'm for and against honestly I think the woman
05:57:56
Brian Atlasshould pay for everything of course you that's honestly that's like the most that's the most Alpha thing so wait question if you were doing Alpha okay but what if you doing that
05:58:06
Kenderly Ryanyou get to stay home and I get to Surf and the woman she has to go out and toil in the fields but how much worth do you think you would feel like I'm not saying how much worth that we anyone see you how worthy do you feel as a person
05:58:19
Brian Atlassitting at home for years on end depending on a woman as a man growing up the way you were how this this is the ultimate level of the societal
05:58:30
Brian Atlasprogramming when it comes to elevating elevating being a wage slave
05:58:38
Brian Atlasover all else I don't think even for both men and women a challenger approaches I don't think that the
05:58:49
Brian Atlasultimate the ultimate what's the term um the ultimate oh my God it's been a long episode I'm on uh the
05:59:00
Brian Atlasultimate sense of purpose is making money or career or a job like I to me that's not but if your wife is care of it you're going to be at home so
05:59:11
Brian Atlasyeah I'm going to kick up my feet can I she can come home and cook you'll be divorced like in ring we got some great surf spots in Santa Barbara I'm just going to
05:59:23
Carla Eliasurf it's going to be no I'm being a bit fous I think I should also say that I'm not against like 7030 20 80 well let's have the husband introduce himself welcome welcome to the show man
05:59:36
Brian Atlashey everybody my name's Dustin can we just have you pop your hat off just cast a bit of if you want throw it backwards just the the bill or is it the bill the front
05:59:45
Brian Atlaspart It cast Shadow sideways good yes man the punk rock sideways hat yes how you do it it just casts a bit of shadow on the eye so oh okay backwards
05:59:56
Brian Atlasbackwards is back I mean do without the Hat okay Channel my oh dude let's get yes we have some in the studio um okay
06:00:09
Dustin (Carla's husband)so tell us a little bit about yourself Dustin you're uh age I'm uh 25 uh just recently got out of the military am I good with Mike yeah yeah um I've been
06:00:21
Dustin (Carla's husband)bouncing back and forth trying to learn new skills and jobs and uh I've been in the process for going on to the police force for about a year now uh should be going in in January what what branch of the military were you in I was in the
06:00:33
Brian AtlasNavy in the Navy okay thanks for your service man amazing were you enlisted or officer enlisted enlisted okay got it and uh I'm trying to think what else I had um so
06:00:45
Dustin (Carla's husband)you met Carla met Carla tell us about uh tell us about the first meeting how did you guys meet uh we actually met on a dating app uh I got real bored with Tinder so uh I
06:00:57
Dustin (Carla's husband)switched over to Bumble and uh let the girl talk to me first okay uh the good stuff and then uh I actually invited her out for drinks but turns out she's alerted to alcohol and that was the
06:01:09
Dustin (Carla's husband)first uh green flag that I got from her M uh so we went for coffee and uh yeah yeah just uh got some coffee walked out on the beach talked about our last
06:01:21
Dustin (Carla's husband)stories and then I was like you you hungry and she went out to Denny's with me and I got to meet her family on the
06:01:28
Brian Atlasfirst date actually it was uh very impromptu wow okay um and uh so you guys met on Bumble it sounded like and actually there's a video on this so why
06:01:41
Brian Atlasdon't we pull up the I think it's the next video here that we have that's how she met her husband okay go ahead and we'll play it part three as you how I met my husband from the first coffee meet up I knew that he was a one but I didn't mean I was going to cancel on all my other dates we are believers of
06:01:54
Carla Eliarotational dating here and we're single until we're not but what did my husband have to do in order to get my full attention I him to get exclusivity after our coffee meet up he did invite me on an actual date and we both knew that we were talking to different people because if you're on the apps you just know that you're talking to multiple people but of course my husband another date he was
06:02:06
Carla Eliavery insistent because he knew he knew that I had option wait again it happened again can you put it it was a bit fast
06:02:16
Brian Atlastoo maybe 1.25x speed um what part three oh my goodness oh my God yo guys go to
06:02:26
Brian Atlastwitch.tv/ whatever drop as a follow drop is a prime sub if you have one um and be sure to subscribe to Mason's only fans account um while you're at it you
06:02:37
Brian Atlaswill be seeing nothing but um yes yes yeah it's just open for do you guys think you get nothing from it you guys think he'd make good money money on o he would he would I think he wouldn't be
06:02:49
Holly Treatsable to deal with how many times they're like can we just see you lose your virginity but the thing is every every day you're going to get I will pay you x amount of dollars all day to you could
06:03:02
Brian Atlasdo wait Holly yeah Mason I'd like to broker something here oh nice my fee is 30%
06:03:11
Brian Atlaswow she she has an only fans you're a virgin yeah could go to Vegas you could get married it would be legit I guess totally legal totally yeah
06:03:25
Holly Treatstotally got but is he Jewish is he Jewish yeah I got to say you only you only Jewish guys I don't only Jewish guys only trying to marry a
06:03:37
Holly TreatsJewish guy so and he's saving himself for a very special situation and so would you do it what you do do you want to join the tribe what you Doon do you want to join the tribe I hate to let you
06:03:48
TTS/Donationsdown Brian it's not going to happen yeah I'm kidding it was a good idea high quality idea to be honest the women in the light aquamarine shirt with the two leaves on her neck is the most beautiful
06:04:00
Brian Atlasout of all of you thank you so thank you for that can okay thank you appreciate it appreciate it Nick were you able to get that video going she's like um yeah go ahead actual date and we both knew
06:04:14
Carla Eliathat we were talking to different people because if you're on the apps you just know that you're talking to multiple people but of course my husband wanted another date he was very insistent because he knew he knew that I had options but he remembered something he
06:04:26
Carla Eliaremembered my work schedule he remembered what time I got off he remembered what days I was off so you can bet that this man was asking me if I was busy or if I was free after 6:00 p.m. and and he knew my days off I don't know why I told him my days off but he knew because he knew my days off he
06:04:39
Carla Eliawould always call First dips after our first date I would always receive a text message at 5:45 from this man asking me what are we feeling today Chinese Sushi Italian every single time he wouldn't
06:04:50
Carla Eliamiss I did have a part-time Hostess job my full-time job was managing rental properties let me rephrase that leasing rental properties so I worked on weekends and he was off on weekends but this man took any opportunity to spend
06:05:02
Carla Eliatime with me so he would always bring me lunch during lunch hours for me anytime time I said I'm not available after work he would be like oh but you're available for lunch right what do you want for lunch it was getting spicy and the one thing I loved about this man is that he
06:05:14
Carla Eliawould do anything in his power to give me what I wanted this one time I mentioned to him that I wanted to go to Julian and it's like a small town near San Diego but I told him I wanted to go to Julian and I was going to go to Julian on my day off and obviously since
06:05:25
Carla Eliahe was in the military it could take days or weeks to get days off approved I don't know how this man would do it but he would take me wherever I wanted to go get fast approvals just to take me wherever I wanted to go on the third
06:05:37
Carla Eliadate we were eating sushi and he looked at me and he told me you're my wife and I'm your husband and I will prove it to you I have a year to prove it to you that I am your husband how sexy is that like put yourself in my position where you just met this hot sexy southern man
06:05:50
Carla Eliawho's extremely masculine with a thick accent he's telling you this but you ladies already know that I think talk is cheap so I did not believe him I was like yeah right prove it and well here we are today and because men also have standards he said hey I want to continue
06:06:03
Carla Eliapursuing you but this needs to be exclusive so I agreed to exclusivity by this point he had already shown me all his finances his credit score how much money he was making how much money he had saved his plans and everything so I felt like it was safe to be exclusive with him what made him extremely
06:06:15
Carla Eliapersistent to me was the fact that I had a physical boundary he says that that drove him mad more interested in me because I had standards and if I was willing to protect myself in that way I was going to be able to protect our family and our relationship in the same
06:06:26
Carla Eliaway point being never lower your standards for anybody you are single until you're not you are single until married ladies be
06:06:37
Brian Atlaswise period okay so there's a lot there there's a lot there I'm I'm interested in the like single until married thing
06:06:45
Brian Atlasyeah um my mom used to say it 100% so okay so hold on um wait uh
06:06:56
Dustin (Carla's husband)you're wait question so you guys met were you you out of the military now but you were in the military when you guys had met is that right I was in the military when we met gotcha were you in the barracks sir I was living out in
06:07:07
Brian Atlastown with a couple buddies okay gotcha okay I see um and so is that a pretty accurate assessment of the the meet the first meet oh yeah I
06:07:18
TTS/Donationsthink I told her mom first that uh I had a couple years nion donated $100 welcome dude how much do you make
06:07:27
TTS/Donationsare you allowed to have children in your wife your wife uh do you want oh boy under your wife wait baby baby do you
06:07:38
Dustin (Carla's husband)think you're under a dictatorship I do not think I'm under a dictatorship I I run my household okay uh she just makes the food and uh points me in the right
06:07:48
Brian Atlasdirection okay um classy answer wait uh so I had to ask you a question but it just slipped my mind before that chat came in single until married oh single single until married or no you had asked him some wait hold
06:08:02
Brian Atlason I'm trying to remember what it was the finances credit card and saving oh on the okay yeah yeah so on the third date um oh there's a hold on there's a did you mention like the third
06:08:14
Carla Elia (overlap)datee about the finances credit score was that in this video no it wasn't in another one I said that I was exclusive because he had shown me his like background okay I must I must have my notes here a little bit out of order no
06:08:27
Brian Atlasit was it was in that video mentioned it in that mentioned it but it didn't say like what happened on the third day oh but you you mentioned that he on the third day showed you finance his credit score how much money he was making how much money he had saved his plans uh so
06:08:39
Carla Eliaonly safe to be exclusive then so no uh for for you or yeah so I think we were both pretty open and we both were rotational dating at the time and I was just the reason why I
06:08:52
Carla Eliaencourage a lot of women to rotational day and men too and Men I encourage both men and women to rotational day is to see you know your options and really get to see who really is putting their best foot forward to win your heart both for
06:09:04
Carla Eliaboth men and women and well Justin was just extremely persistent and he spoke my language we both wanted the same thing so I think and because he wanted my full attention
06:09:15
Carla EliaI think he knew that finances was a big was important because we both wanted marriage and in marriage finances is a really big big big Hot Topic so I think that well the way that I took it he was extremely proud of where he was in his
06:09:28
Brian Atlaslife and he just showed me everything he didn't have anything to hide gotcha and it sounds like you were both doing the rotational dating thing which I sounds like just means dating other people yeah
06:09:40
Brian Atlasyeah um did you have any issues with that did like that cuz I mean it seemed like you really really liked her was it to some degree upsetting like that she had she was dating other men or was it you're just like and that's how dating
06:09:53
Dustin (Carla's husband)is did you kind of accept it well the moment she looked at me and said uh should we be exclusive I said yes let's be exclusive I don't want to see other people this is what I want I knew what I
06:10:04
Brian Atlaswanted gotcha that was it gotcha but early on when it sounded like perhaps you were you were both upfront with each other that you were doing the rotational dating was that at
06:10:16
Brian Atlasall well I suppose you were doing it too so maybe you felt like I'm doing it she's doing it it is whatever but I mean was it upsetting to hear that she was rotational dating well I
06:10:28
Dustin (Carla's husband)knew she wasn't being promiscuous when she was rotational dating so it's not really that big of a deal I knew she wasn't kissing nobody our first date she didn't even kiss me like I hell I tried
06:10:39
Dustin (Carla's husband)you tried yeah uh I even tried to hold her hand and well actually I I tried to she was walking across the street and I held her hand to keep her from getting
06:10:49
Dustin (Carla's husband)run over by a car and she said I'm not holding your hand oh okay so so a car's honking at her and you for you went for the grab and she was like oh
06:10:59
Dustin (Carla's husband)absolutely okay I knew I knew this was a different breed of woman oh okay came
06:11:05
Dustin (Carla's husband)from a long line of uh this is easy okay next got it okay gotcha and uh were you
06:11:16
Brian Atlasuh wait hold on wait uh cuz I feel like the whole rotational dating thing like cuz I didn't know coming on to the show that you had waited until marriage to have sex and that you were a virgin so when I think
06:11:28
Brian Atlasof rotational dating I think like they're sleeping with other people so that I mean I think that's a little certainly gives me a new a different view on it because I would certainly like I wouldn't even if I was I wouldn't
06:11:40
Carla Eliaeven pursue a girl that was sleeping with other men exactly so that that's why I tell my ladies to rotational date but rotational dating doesn't mean to be intimate I'm like ah spend time with each other like let's go back to how it was where you're just trying to find
06:11:51
Carla Eliaconnection to see if it works out and that's why there's this big thing on like coffee dates but that's why I don't say coffee dates I say coffee meetups so you can get to know you know preview to the movie and it's it's a new form of
06:12:03
Carla Eliadating like you can get you can talk to multiple men I I want women to talk to multiple men just you know sleeping and kissing that that should be exclusive I talk about girlfriend privileges versus wife privileges you know dating privileges you know versus the other
06:12:16
Monica (Swedish Bella)ones and I think men should also have standards did you have something yeah so I definitely agree on that um and when when I got single from my ex we were together 11 years I was 19 he was 10
06:12:27
Monica (Swedish Bella)years older when I got out of that Mar relationship while we were engaged I had no idea how to date or what to do I was so young when I met him I I have hardly
06:12:37
Monica (Swedish Bella)dated before U but I totally agree because me and my my husband now we had a long-distance relationship I lived in Sweden he lived here so we spend a lot
06:12:48
Monica (Swedish Bella)of time just talking on Skype and on FaceTime and texting and I think when you do that you get to know that person so well because you're not scared of
06:12:58
Monica (Swedish Bella)like telling that person everything like listen I have debt I have this you know I have this I have that and he was like like I I have this and I don't have that but I have this you know so I just think
06:13:09
Monica (Swedish Bella)it makes it so much stronger um when you actually have those conversations instead of going in a date and jumping in bed interesting and on the rotational
06:13:21
Brian Atlasdating thing um I disagree with you a little well you do make some valid points with
06:13:28
Brian Atlasit however my view is and my own advice to men is uh where I I suppose it comes out a conflict with your advice is that
06:13:40
Brian Atlasas a guy I want a woman's undivided romantic and sexual attention so once I come into a woman's life I want to be
06:13:48
Brian Atlasthe only guy that she has eyes for immediately like because if even if she's not having sex with those other
06:13:57
Brian Atlasmen if she's talking to other dudes me personally um and I certainly if men if you have the leverage to do this um I recommend you do it but if she's like a
06:14:08
Brian Atlasfence sitter like she's oh I don't know if I'm a I don't want to be a maybe for girl like I want immediately that like genuine just immediacy with her uh
06:14:19
Carla Eliainterest in me and I want it undivided so um what I would say is you have to win it and that's what I tell my ladies win it you have to work for it you have to work for my attention yeah absolutely
06:14:31
Carla Eliawomen lose again I am the table lose I am the table okay no no we'll get into that in a little bit absolutely so and I think like my husband got my undivided
06:14:40
Carla Eliaattention you know after a couple dates because like he won it he won it so I think that it's valid to want that but to you know you you have to win her over
06:14:51
Carla Eliabecause then again like women lose you're she's spending the more time she invests in you she's losing more and if she's not if you're not proposing or you're not suggesting marriage again she loses so I think that totally valid I
06:15:04
Carla Eliatotally see why you would want her full attention but you got to earn it boy yeah so uh totally true I just I think you that doesn't that doesn't help anybody I have earned it that might that might work with women who don't really
06:15:16
Mason Gregoirerecognize their worth but women who know their worth and women who like know the type of life that they want it's not going to be AC I think you can I think you can know your worth and still not rotational date like you can go one
06:15:28
Mason Gregoireperson at a time I'm only only going to invest time in you okay there's there are these things okay morals align whatever I'm not going to see you anymore go to the next person so and I
06:15:40
Mason Gregoirecould see that working I don't know about the like having three guys on my roster and I'm going to let let them viy for my attention and the best man wins so I don't think it's a super longterm
06:15:52
Holly Treatsthing though like I don't think they're in this dance for like you know months on end I think it's like a okay like we dated for two months I or for two weeks I figured out after two dates not into it you know what I mean and I think I
06:16:04
Brian Atlasthink if if other men are fine with it that's fine but what I can say for me personally if I come into a woman's life even the first time meeting and she's
06:16:14
Brian Atlastelling me hey I I I've had this I've actually had this happen I went on a date with a girl I met her on hinge I think dating apps are a huge L generally speaking because that's where you often
06:16:25
Brian Atlasencounter people that are dating multiple people and look I'm it that's kind of the way the dating world is I personally don't think it's a I don't agree with it but uh I went on the state
06:16:37
Brian Atlaswith a girl she had just downloaded the app she told me like oh I just downloaded it this past weekend and I went we went out on Wednesday or something and she had told me she'd already been on two dates and that she
06:16:47
Brian Atlashad three dates planned for the weekend Oh instantly lost interest I was like okay like I'm not going to be like number three and like this like I'm not interested in that's fine and that's
06:17:00
Brian Atlastotally fine yeah and I don't think you object to that but what I'm saying is like if if this whole rotational dating thing um I I don't think like I think in some there's some pros to it but I also
06:17:12
Brian Atlasthink like there are some men if they are aware and I think Honesty is very important if if you're like saying hey just letting you know like I'm dating other people right now like I think a lot of men are good men are going to be
06:17:23
Carla Elialike okay yeah well he was well he was a good man and no I'm not saying I'm not I'm not saying I understand but let me go let me go ahead and address one point so the reason why I say to rotational date to women specifically is because
06:17:34
Carla Eliawomen get attacked we're emotional get attached I like women who get attached get
06:17:42
Carla Eliaattached get attached baby I wish I wish I could say that we could do that and we should do that but the thing is like we've been we've been mistreated and and in a way taken advantage of because we've done that
06:17:53
Carla Eliabefore so the solution that I proposed was like why don't you just talk to multiple men you're just talking you're just getting to know each other go to a coffee meet up first because women we're emotional beings like the first thing that we want to do is to get to know you
06:18:05
Carla Eliaeven more and what happens you prolong that into 2 weeks into 3 months into 6 months into a year and then there's no ring So to avoid all of that because another thing I coach women who date for marriage I don't coach women who are just dating to mess around so I I think
06:18:18
Carla Eliathat that's that's the main reason why I suggest that and again it it might not be like a cup of tea and that's fine but there there are still I don't want to tell I you know I I do want to let women know that there are good men who are going to be like okay well she's if she
06:18:30
Brian Atlastreats me this way that she's not letting me hold her hand she's not kissing me she's not being promiscuous she's getting to know me she's doing that with other men but I think you're like to some degree you're a bit of an outlier like you are because you said
06:18:42
Brian Atlasyou're you're a virgin right and I and I think I already mentioned this is is that if you're a virgin as a woman I think you have far more leverage and negotiating power to actually get that
06:18:53
Brian Atlassort of treatment from men but if you're a woman who slept with 20 30 40 guys and you're like okay now my new standard and look as a woman at any given point if you want to change up how you move
06:19:05
Brian Atlasthat's 100% your prerogative and men should respect that however well men are going to look at that and just say that's not the type of person I want to date like if a girl for example
06:19:18
Brian Atlasfor me it's like okay you've had you've s with 30 previous people and now you're coming to me and like you want me to wait 3 months or 6 months or till marriage to have sex with you I'm just
06:19:30
Brian Atlaslike okay why do you think we married so fast what's that why do you think we got married so fast for the hello I don't no but I know what you mean I know what you mean I know what you mean but I think well I I I'm sure
06:19:43
Mason Gregoireyou guys got married for other reasons like you care about each other love each other finances uh close personal goals bur obviously when sex is not like
06:19:54
Mason Gregoireclouding your judgment you can make those decisions like you you have all of those conversations all the difficult conversations immediately so that you know okay is this person worth my time like I'm going to ask him all of the
06:20:06
Mason Gregoirehard questions so I don't have to waste two years of my life sleeping with this person getting connected with them and then all of a sudden I figure out oh wait you're Pro abortion I'm not okay
06:20:17
Carla Eliawith that yeah no and and to add to what you were saying about being the outlier to add to what you were saying about being the outlier that's the thing I coach women who are virgin still and who want marriage and it's it's like it it's
06:20:30
Carla Eliareally hard for them and and there's a lot of women who resonate with me because I did the whole thing purity ring like I you know I waited I got married I I gave you know I'm traditional at home and there's a lot of women who want that and that's why I
06:20:42
Carla Eliathink that my advice goes you know specifically I cater to those women but they still exist guys so please like I'm asking and urging us to like have specific standards to raise these men up
06:20:54
Brian Atlasto you know get better but I'm sure you're also I mean you're there's probably women who are W watching you who are not virgins who have double digit body counts 10 20 30 absolutely
06:21:05
Carla Eliaand I mean I'm assuming that despite this you're probably still advising these women to yeah because here's the thing so I was raised by a single mom
06:21:16
Carla Eliaokay so my mom was and I I I love I love my mom but I was raised by a single mom and I saw her get everything she has everything she has a dream the dream life that she wants her own house the
06:21:27
Carla Eliadream car she has everything she wants and she was a single mother there it just depends on the type of man that you know it the man that you choose if you Choose Wisely you get everything but that that's where we're struggling of
06:21:39
Monica (Swedish Bella)choosing wisely I do have to say like go back to women being um going on feelings and emotional me
06:21:49
Monica (Swedish Bella)personally I don't I don't go a lot on looks of course the first time you see a person yes you I mean you like the way a person looks but I kind of need to
06:22:00
Monica (Swedish Bella)interact with the person to see if we have a connection like do we get along can I talk to you can we talk about things and
06:22:11
Monica (Swedish Bella)if silence is awkward then maybe we don't really work like I so dating would be important for me to you know go for coffee and talk to these people I mean
06:22:23
Monica (Swedish Bella)you can FaceTime you can do a lot of different things just to get to know each other because you might be hot as but you might be a really not CL you know and that's totally fine and this I think this is just a difference
06:22:35
Brian Atlasof approach that we have my my personal view is I think typically you know I think as a guy my view because I think men should be have much higher standards
06:22:47
Brian Atlaspreferences and boundaries when it comes to this my view is if that you the woman you're pursuing her romantic attention
06:22:56
Holly Treatsis divided my my view is that I don't she ain't the like I lose interest she just met you like how they were supposed to get single to meet
06:23:07
Brian Atlasyou to me you have you're currently da you said you were single you but you said you were single and you're dating three guys and you're like sleeping with all of them I mean it's more it's not I wouldn't the way you make it sound it
06:23:19
Holly Treatssounds like okay that's what you said there's a we I know but it's not like it's like I saw my friend in New York last month right and then I come back like it's like I'm not I wouldn't date you I wouldn't date you because of that
06:23:31
Kenderly Ryancuz you're I'm trying to no I know but I'm saying like I I do I do have to say that and also we're not looking to date your type we not interested in your type anyway well
06:23:42
Kenderly RyanI'm just like you're cute like on a physical like physical basis yeah purely physical basis you're great but yeah but I mean your genre of a man not you like
06:23:53
Brian Atlaspeople under your you mean white you mean white people yeah your people yeah oh my God I'm white people you people you want to bring it back bring bring it back bring it back so wait wait are you
06:24:04
Kenderly Ryansaying but you're talking about her she you don't say white white guys I do no I she's white so that's why she's laughing talking about the caliber of men the way that you think we don't agree with your thoughts so we're not going to date
06:24:17
Kenderly Ryansomeone that has the same different thoughts like guess what thoughts of M do you disagree with oh man I don't have that list come on come on let's hear it let's hear it let's hear just give me one or two or three give it to me I mean well for one you crossed my friend's
06:24:30
Kenderly Ryanboundaries so that was a big one for me oh my God bro I crossed her bound yes she said no how many times that that to me that's an indicator of who you
06:24:39
Kenderly Ryanare this is wait wait hold up hold up no she's not maybe right now but I know her this is she's a woman she's going to be hurt she got her boundaries crossed this say that's like I okay you got to get
06:24:52
Brian Atlasyour boundaries cross to get use and I get it but it is what it is oh my God you guys you guys really want to like no but the way you're framing it is incredibly disingenuous because you're trying to suggest because you're you're
06:25:03
Brian Atlastrying to say because she said no are are you in suggesting that I am a Grapist because of that like that's that's the way that's the way women use
06:25:14
Kenderly Ryanshaming language to try to pathologize men p and I'm not it's just a little push of a style has nothing to do with your sexual kep saying she didn't want to talk about it she kept saying no there was three other women who had to
06:25:25
Brian Atlasinterject and stop you and you still got mad at all us that's my point is that she said no that's it Hot Topic first off it was not like Mo like constant no
06:25:36
Brian Atlasshe said no and then I and then I it four or five times and then no hold on and then stop and then I asked for well what about a range and she said no and then there and then I look I don't recall the exact verbatim back and forth
06:25:50
Brian Atlasthat we had but then we moved on to somebody else and then I went back to her asking if there was some somebody had provided an additional cont or I forgot exactly but what's that range
06:26:01
Brian Atlassomeone provided range oh someone had provided range I went back bro it's a conversation about dating like hello and of course I'm going to P I'm going to give you an example so I did you're the that's the type of man that
06:26:14
Brian Atlaswe wouldn't date we wouldn't date someone who asked us over and over and over and we said no okay this yeah but you're really like trying to paint it in the most unflattering light I'm talking about this situation that's why I
06:26:25
Kenderly Ryanbrought it up I'm not talking about any other situation really triggered y'all are so triggered yes because you crossed a boundary yes I'm going to get triggered a boundary a boundary yes if
06:26:37
Brian Atlassome if a woman says no you stop but this okay no no no do you guys chat do you hear what she's doing you're trying to paint it in this most unflattering
06:26:47
Brian Atlasbad light bad faith way as possible if a woman says no you stop you're trying to paint me as like some like some SE like
06:26:57
Brian Atlasa Grapist basically because I I asked her a follow-up question and I pushed back a little bit because she said body count shouldn't matter so of course we're in the midst of a debate and a
06:27:08
Brian Atlasconversation and you're trying to paint me in this totally egregious way because we're in the middle of a debate and a conversation of course I'm the host of the show I'm going to push back out of here with that's sleeping with
06:27:20
TTS/Donationsmultiple people at the same time your lady parts are literally a sewer at this point what man with any self respect would want any contact your infested
06:27:30
Holly Treatsskin um I'd actually like to add so I just met my in so I'm a designer contrary to all this and I just met my interior design hero named Melanie Rose from how to build a Sex Room on Netflix
06:27:42
Holly Treatsand you would think this woman who is a famous designer of sex rooms would be very happy to share about what led her to being interested in sex rooms and one would think maybe this lady has her own
06:27:53
Holly Treatssex room and this lady has this show got huge on Netflix she gets recognized everywhere she's like a cute Mary Poppins type lady and when you ask her so Melanie what's in your sex room she
06:28:04
Mason Gregoireresponds that's private and I don't share it with anybody she has an entire show called how to build a sex room and this lady will not discuss her sex room yeah okay well we are yeah so we are on a podcast where we're talking about dating and dating topics you asked
06:28:17
Holly Treatsspecifically about one thing and wouldn't get off of the body count question though like what is my body count we lingered on it for like 30 seconds I can't wait for this start toir it was it was can't wait to go back it
06:28:29
Mason Gregoirewas linger there were a cple maybe was a minute or two but like this is this is part of having conversation like the conversational bring like sometimes people are going to push back on what you're saying like especially if we're having if we're on a platform where
06:28:42
Mason Gregoirewe're going to disagree on certain things people are going to push back on what you say so you're allowed to get triggered you're allowed to get offended but you can't accuse the host or whoever
06:28:53
Mason Gregoireis asking you those questions you don't care about me you are you are like there is essay going on you're acting like a Grapist
06:29:04
Kenderly Ryanstuff like that you can't be making those accusations when you come onto a platform accusations no one called you a great what I Wasing to this conversation
06:29:15
Kenderly Ryanhe asked me for an example so I gave it I he goes why wouldn't you date um under my umbrella me whatever that was why I wouldn't okay that's fine no it's fine fine but the reason I wasn't saying
06:29:28
Kenderly Ryanthat's what you do to everyone I'm saying that display of behavior for me is a sign and something I would never entertain that's my choice that's my preference I mean yeah but you're try again you're trying to paint it in the
06:29:40
Brian Atlasmost unflattering bad like then that's how I right but as the as the host of the podcast I have a conversational burden and Duty like I'm playing Devil's Advocate on certain
06:29:50
Brian Atlasthings I'm pushing back like I'm trying to kind of I do dig on this show but like that's part of the format of the
06:30:00
Holly Treatsshow I mean he asked me to sell my virginity mhmm also you and just we were very appreciate it I would even appreciate your virginity I'm sorry he
06:30:10
Gloria Calderonedid that to you but yeah goodness gracious appreciate it God damn it I mean you did ask me for my body count when you felt offended by me so I mean oh that's actually a very good point wait who was the one who asked for your
06:30:22
Holly Treatsbody count asked me for my body count wow that's actually it's kind of interesting yeah you didn't really answer me either though yeah because I'm not going to speak about my sex life right and that was the point I was trying to make that not all women want
06:30:35
Brian Atlasto share about their body count so thank you for helping me with that yeah look the the whole the whole thing stems from the reason I pushed back is because you said that body isn't
06:30:45
Holly Treatsa big deal it doesn't matter and so like it would occur to me logically and you don't want to answer because of a man maybe I'm seriously dating one of the guys that I'm seeing and maybe he's watching and I don't want him to share I'm just not married so I'm not flexing
06:30:57
Monica (Swedish Bella)my husband right it's it's like we all got goad sorry um I just want to touch on that romantic part you said that R the dating like the wait what um I guess
06:31:08
Monica (Swedish Bella)we could come back what yeah I just want to come back to that um being as a woman romantically like involved with other men if she is like dating other men besides you women don't really get
06:31:21
Monica (Swedish Bella)romantically involved like that on the get-go they're just seeing guys as friends and seeing maybe there is something there but I personally if I
06:31:31
Monica (Swedish Bella)went on a date on the first date I don't get romantically involved in love or like oh my God I'm going to spend my my time with you and then go to the next guy and say the same thing you know if I meet the right person that's because
06:31:44
Brian Atlaswomen have an abundance mindset but when you do like here's the thing right when you encounter women because okay I think most men's experience when it comes to dating women is women
06:31:56
Brian Atlasnaturally have an abundance mindset because women's sexual and romantic optionality is orders of magnitude to men's like most men have very few
06:32:07
Brian Atlasoptions most men can't be going on like like an average girl like we talked about earlier an average girl if she was so inclined could it's very easy for a woman to be a but an average girl
06:32:17
Brian Atlascould have a new date every single day of the week whereas an average guy take dating apps for example he's lucky to get one date a month that's even then
06:32:28
Monica (Swedish Bella)that's but that's like a woman has you know she will probably have DEC to say no I don't want to sleep with you if if like me personally if I don't feel your
06:32:39
Monica (Swedish Bella)Vibe or I don't you know get along with you romantically where we you know we have a good time and We Vibe yeah I won't sleep with you okay but so just
06:32:49
Brian Atlasjust to finish my point on that so my position as somebody who's had plenty of experience dealing with lowest women kind of fence sitter women women with
06:33:00
Brian Atlaslike medium interest you know fence sitters and also who's had experience with women who have demonstrated very high levels of interest for me there's no going back anymore I'm not dealing
06:33:13
Monica (Swedish Bella)with low interest interest women anymore yeah I've had women who like with really high interest totally agree and I mean there it's very annoying to meet somebody you like and that person it's
06:33:23
Holly Treatsjust like you don't know like it's like I'm on this leg or this what are we doing that's the worst talking to a guy who made me feel like I can't tell like me or hate me so I'm just going to stop talking to you
06:33:36
Brian Atlasbecause I don't know where I stand in this right so so I totally get where you're coming from but unfortunately I think for the vast majority of men because to to some degree I because of
06:33:46
Brian Atlasmy you know my my online presence and I think women also feel this because women you'll get contacted by men you your social you never know what the person's you but like there are definitely women that will pursue you and will
06:33:59
Brian Atlasdemonstrate a really high level of Interest So and I've I've even had that before before uh I got involved in social media but like there's once you've had that for me there's just I don't I'm not going to deal with low
06:34:11
Monica (Swedish Bella)interest interest women I mean I've met I've met guys who I think are super attractive and like oh my God this is the hottest dude ever and then you hang out and it's like
06:34:22
Monica (Swedish Bella)cringe true you know and and the other way around like not the best looking on on a picture but then you hang out and it's like awesome the best
06:34:34
Brian Atlasand just and I know you want to come in here and just to set Carla but my view is there's like this whole thing about and I think Carla you actually have a video on this is like playing hard to get or whatever a woman who plays hard to get
06:34:45
Brian Atlasquickly becomes hard to want so for me like I'm not playing that game oh okay like you're not being we had uh there was this were you on I don't know if you were on that show there was a girl who
06:34:58
Brian Atlaswas like one of the the ladies was talking about how this guy was like total simp and he he'd sent 25 Love Letters to this woman she never responded and then he stopped and then
06:35:09
Brian Atlasshe's like got back in touch with him oh where's my why you stop yeah I was like I romantic by the way that women should not women need to
06:35:20
Carla Eliabe accountable and not do that either how old are you 34 okay so the women that I mainly coach they're in their early 20s right so they're going to be talking to men that are also in their early 20s at the age of 34 you have a
06:35:31
Carla Elialot of more wisdom a lot of more experience than most younger men you know in the dating scene so what I've noticed because this is the way that I've lived all my life and the way that the women in my life have lived it's be
06:35:43
Carla Eliahard to get let him win you over be be a lady let him pursue you right and so to some men maybe not you but to the men that I've attracted before they seem to
06:35:54
Carla Elialove it and they seem to you know really you not just find it entertaining but like oh my gosh like this is I'm working you value what you work for right and so maybe to you and to a lot of people that's not the case because you already
06:36:07
Carla Eliakind of like ran out of that cuz you see it as a game which is totally valid but we also have to go back into con the context as to why I say be hard to get again I'm protecting a specific group of
06:36:18
Carla Eliawomen who are you know is still in you know it's still in high school 17 or no no I know she's she's 22 I know but but you said you said I I wish I could have
06:36:29
Carla Eliagone back in time in high school and would have told myself you know XYZ so that's who I'm speaking to so in a way I'm protecting these women from putting themselves in unsafe you know
06:36:40
Mason Gregoirerelationships it's not well you can you can still be interested in somebody and not play hard to get yeah I'm sorry so let's go what's hard to get first of all like what's hard to get in your and so
06:36:52
Mason Gregoireso if you're like I'm not going to kiss you until like we're exclusive that's hard to get so you are barring certain things from this man because you're not exclusive so then
06:37:04
Mason GregoireI'm not going to have sex with you until we're married I think that's being hard to get now if you're refusing to give them attention and like that's how you're playing hard to get I don't want to have I don't want anything to do
06:37:17
Monica (Swedish Bella)yourself as hard to get because you don't want to have sex before marriage or or or do you just explain it this is my Rel religious belief you know I think I'm hard to get because uh I have all of these yeah so I have these boundaries
06:37:31
Mason GregoireI'm not going to have sex before marriage I bad thing yeah exactly no yeah I don't think you think it is but yeah there are all of these physical boundaries as well as emotional boundaries that I'll I'll set up and say
06:37:41
Mason Gregoirethis only comes with commitment u in as being exclusive or in marriage my my husband was hard to get by the way I had to for two years sure and last I mean I
06:37:53
Brian Atlasdo want to move on so we can't Linger on this too long my just personal view on being hard to get again I already said it but if a woman plays hard to get she quickly becomes hard to want that's my
06:38:05
Brian Atlasthat's my view you don't want her more just to see if you can no I'm just like I'm just wondering okay she's not she's not really warm to me okay goodbye because some guys are waste my time don't want to feel played either like
06:38:17
Holly Treatswhen guys feel games they just feel like they're going to get played and so when things even if it's not a game and it just reminds them of a game I'm just like I'm very I think I'm very direct I'm very blunt I'm very
06:38:29
Gloria Calderonestraightforward I like you you like me cool let's be together I think when she means like hard to get is like she's still going to show you interest but you're just not going to get everything all at once I think that's what she means by the so what I'm
06:38:42
Carla Eliagoing to get so like what I do give you know before the exclusivity is like that attention like I'm going to give you attention I'm going to save time for you I'm going to say yes to the dates because that's me showing interest so I'm glad that we established what we think get I think what most people hear
06:38:55
Mason Gregoirehard to get it's usually okay I'm going to withhold interest and I'm going to like not respond to them I'll live leave them on red for like a wait can we pull up next video next
06:39:06
Carla Eliavideo Nick if you can get exactly yeah Noone no one here has time to be like I don't have time one sec guys go ahead go ahead you could start doing to check if he's husband material or not is by asking this one question if there were a
06:39:18
Carla Eliafight to break out in the middle of a grocery store or in the middle of an event what type of man would he be would he be the one to pull out his phone to record or would he be the man to try to fix the so I explain how
06:39:29
Brian Atlasscuffed I think probably another video video played it's okay just f fix it um probably you can you're going to have to unmute it just to see which other video started playing all randomly um are you by the way you can
06:39:41
Brian Atlasclose out the tabs for all the previous videos cuz that could be overloading the computer a little bit um we have so many open yeah yeah yeah um can you pull that one back up let's just see the rest of
06:39:53
Carla Eliait this fight and get in between and be the middleman AKA he's reactive to a situation like that because tell me why nowadays men instead of helping out the woman who's in danger or anybody that's in danger for that matter instead of helping and being reactive all they do
06:40:06
Dustin (Carla's husband)is pull out their phone to post on Tik Tok postive I think let me tell you something wait question so what would you do in that situation oh yeah uh so I definitely saw