Single Mom Wants Date To PAY For Babysitter?! | Dating Talk #80

Date: 2023-07-03

Duration: 5h 14m

Guests

Brian Atlas

BBella (valarama TV)>

EElizabeth (DT96)>

JJulia Lynn Sandoval >

TTaylor (DT80)>

VVictoria (DT80)>

Identified Speakers

SPEAKER_00TTS Reader(audience)

SPEAKER_01Brian Atlas(host)

SPEAKER_03Bella (valarama TV)(guest)

SPEAKER_04TikTok Video(audience)

SPEAKER_06Elizabeth(guest)

SPEAKER_08Sadie(guest)

SPEAKER_09Julia Lynn Sandoval(guest)

SPEAKER_10Victoria(guest)

SPEAKER_11Taylor(guest)

Key Moments

QuoteElizabeth reveals she is 23, has never had a boyfriend, never been on a romantic date, is a 5-time US national figure skater, double gold medalist, youth Olympian, Miss Orange County, Maxim cover, and acted in American Horror Story. Still lives with protective parents and gives all earnings to family.

“I am a two times double gold medalist, I'm a five-time US national competitor... I was Miss Orange County... I was on the cover of Maxim magazine... I worked with American Horror Story.”

QuoteSadie discloses she witnessed friends having sex with up to 4 guys in one night at SLO frat parties; describes witnessing the acts directly.

“I've never seen someone just like meet somebody and automatically like go to a bedroom... I grew up Christian so I was not... in this world like that.”

QuoteJulia shares that at 18-19 she made out with a photographer in his 40s who used his industry status to groom her; says she now feels it was grooming despite consenting at the time, citing brain development under 25.

“I was getting into modeling, he's a photographer... he abused his power in a sense but I consented... I do feel like I was groomed at 18 years old.”

OtherRatings round: Bella self-rates 8, Julia self-rates 9.5, Victoria self-rates 8 (reluctantly), Sadie self-rates 6.5-7, Brian self-rates 6/6.9. Elizabeth declines number but calls Sadie a 10.

“Bella: eight. Julia: nine or a ten... 9.5. Victoria: eight. Sadie: 6.5-7. Brian: six 6.9 on a good day.”

QuoteTikTok single mom video played on stream: woman demands dates pay for her babysitter, plan creative activities, not invite her daughter, not serve drinks on weekday dates.

“Unless you're offering to pay for the babysitter, I'm not going on that date.”

QuoteBella argues that finding and paying for the babysitter is the single mom's own responsibility if she chooses to participate in dating.

“It's not the guy that potentially might full-time date her... that's not his responsibility. It is yours to find and pay for the babysitter if you actually want to participate in the dating world.”

QuoteVictoria reveals she met her husband (Allen, one of the original four from Justin.TV; face of the BrokeBack Twitch emote; WoW Lich King world-first raider in Blood Legion) by watching him stream and chatting in his Twitch chat; he flew her to San Diego the same week.

“I used to watch him play World of Warcraft on Twitch... Someone said oh she's a girl and he said let me check her out... He flew me out that same week to San Diego to come meet him.”

Topics Discussed

Guest Introductions

Brian introduces the show. Guests introduce themselves: Bella (valarama TV, AZ, Twitch/OF, declines age), Elizabeth (23, LA, model/actress/ice skater), Julia (26, CO/LA, content creator/OF, in first relationship), Taylor (25, FL, Kick streamer), Victoria (married, Canadian in SD, Twitch/OF), Sadie (20, SLO, college student, in relationship). Relationship statuses and OF income discussed.

Body Count and Hookup Culture

Sadie recounts witnessing friends hook up with 3-4 guys per night at SLO frat parties; she remained a virgin until current boyfriend. Panel discusses hookup culture, body count preferences, and whether it matters.

Age Gaps and Grooming

Julia shares experience of making out with a 40s-something photographer when she was 18-19; questions whether consent was truly informed given brain development under 25. Brian notes retroactive regret vs. legal consent distinction. Discussion of brain development and voting age.

OnlyFans Relationship Dynamics

Panel discusses whether men want to date women who do OnlyFans. Arguments about sexual purity vs business, validation from subscribers diminishing partner attention, children and bullying concerns, adam22 open relationship case, top-percentage OF statistics.

Self-Ratings / Looks Scale

Panel rates their own looks 1-10: Bella (8), Julia (9.5), Victoria (8, declines specific number), Sadie (6.5-7), Brian (6/6.9). Elizabeth rates herself implicitly a 10 via Elizabeth rating Sadie as 10.

Single Mom Babysitter Debate

TikTok video played of single mom saying men should pay for her babysitter to earn a date, should not invite her and daughter out, should not expect late-night dates. Panel debates: is it fair to expect date to pay babysitter? Consensus: panel finds it entitled; guest's own responsibility to arrange childcare. Brian notes provisioning for another man's child is sub-optimal.

High-Value Man/Woman Definition

Discussion of what constitutes a "high-value" man (physical, success, character, ambition, values) vs high-value woman (physical appearance, values, character; income less important for women than men).

Dating Apps and Modern Dating

Discussion of dating apps, messaging culture, ghosting, expectations for response speed, relationships starting casual vs committed.

Red Flags Round

Panel shares personal red flags: van lifers (Brian), Instagram-only girls abroad (Julia, sugar daddy implication), impatience/insecurity (Bella), rudeness to service staff (Victoria), looking down on others' views (Julia), rude to mom or animals (Julia), condoms visible on first date (panel discussion).

Transcript

Page 5 of 6

Julia Lynn Sandovallittle bit more so you can do things that like fill you up and me you get me wait who are you talking to her yeah yeah oh okay wait but okay so

Elizabethwhat no maybe maybe the term is like a people pleaser or like people pleaser you have you said two brothers two brothers and one sister are they younger

Brian Atlasthan you are you the oldest child no one younger sister two older brothers two older brothers yeah wait so they call me like Mommy and you so wait it's uh and you live with your mom and dad correct yes is it in the the brothers and

Elizabethsisters also are in the house yeah we're still all together um why is the cooking falling on you maybe it's just like me like like liking

Elizabethto take the lead or like even getting things done I like getting things done yeah so like maybe you like do you like to cook or yeah I do like to cook because definitely a hobby it's a passion of nice I cook them you said you're so busy

Elizabethso like to go work and then yeah like it's kind of like non-stop non-stop to where yeah okay but I like to take pleasure when I feel like someone is I don't know make I don't

Elizabethknow like every time I cook and I give it to like my siblings and if they enjoy it yeah it gives me like a high I guess satisfaction satisfaction okay so you would change about yourself

Julia Lynn Sandovalthat you would do less is what what you're saying I don't I think it think it's harder for you yeah maybe what I'm trying to say is say itself understand yourself on a different level

Julia Lynn Sandovalbecause there's needs for your own self that aren't being met because you're so busy fulfilling needs for others is your like love language Services because that's what yes definitely based

Bella (valarama TV)what about you uh I'm a very impatient person so that's one of the things I would change impatient do you have a temper are you quick to anger no no you said you're impatient

Brian AtlasI am well I have to work on it yes okay definitely all right so you change you could be more patient I think we could all everyone could use a little more patience you know it's good it's good true all right we have sticks and Bones

Brian Atlashere thank you man Brian when you say that you'd rather just have a natural woman so piercings and tattoos are our deal break for you because piercing be looking good just saying my guy from my

Brian Atlasviewpoint TBH whatever makes her feel good and I still feel attracted to her um again it's uh it's kind of scale so like BBL

Brian Atlasis pretty up there versus like she's got the ear piercing is like pretty low on my priority list of things I care about um but I mean if you start let's talk

Brian Atlasabout tattoos like I mean I'd say generally speaking I'd lean more towards preferring women who don't have tattoos I'm not like totally opposed to tattoos

Brian Atlasthat's not a deal breaker for me but like what I being honest generally speaking I would say no tattoos or the less tattoos I find it more attractive but for me tattoos aren't a deal breaker

Brian Atlasbut like if a girl had like gnarly face tattoos like yeah that's a little bit for me that's a little bit unattractive uh piercings

Bella (valarama TV)you know ear piercings I'm not what about tongue piercings and stuff like that

Brian Atlasor like piercing in the intimate parts I think that's a red flag a little bit not necessarily a red flag but like a tongue piercing or nipple piercings or

Julia Lynn Sandovallike a clip piercing it's a little like I don't like them I have friends who have their nipples pierced but I personally am not I would I'll say this I would prefer a girl who doesn't have piercings I think it looks

Brian Atlastrashy you know offense anyone who has it ear piercings I don't like I don't really care but like nipple piercings I'm kind of like um

TaylorI know that has nipple piercings their nipples stay like permanently hard so it's like I'm like same I don't know if I want that it's kind of like you can

Brian Atlassort of make a judgment call based off of I don't know if I see a guy like totally blasted in tattoos with like face tattoos I'm like my immediate thing is

Brian Atlasgoing to be like SoundCloud rapper or like criminal like criminal history like something like that so it's like we all make judgment calls based off of people's lives have you ever you know but have you ever just seen a girl who is just like everything is like she

Julia Lynn Sandovallooks like such a like this is gonna sound very like stereotyping but just so like Goody Two Shoe girl and then the nipples are pierced and you're just like what like when like through me something

Brian Atlasor like the tongue is pierced and you're just she's a what yeah there's like wild like yeah yeah so uh yeah and you're like what are you hiding

Brian Atlasyeah but I mean again it's a scale like a girl who's dyed her hair or a little auburn brown or something is a little different than like

Brian Atlasblue hair green yeah you know so um you know what's actually crazy I I actually used to like girls who had like color in their hair like red or blue

Brian Atlasyeah I used to like it before it was kind of associated with like like far far left like SJ like sjw

Brian Atlaslike super liberal woman it used to mean like it used to be more so tied to like women who are a bit more like Punk or like uh it had to do more with like maybe your music taste or less to do with your politics

Brian Atlasum and also had to do with daddy issues you know so now it's like you know

Brian Atlasyeah you don't like daddy issues I'm so confused but uh yeah now it's like now it's like okay this chick's like probably you can maybe guess a couple things about her politics and whatnot

Brian Atlasbut okay I'm not I'm like I consider myself moderate guy but like I don't know I don't I don't like like super out in either direction I don't like super outspoken people politically like if

Brian Atlasthey're really like that's their whole personality it's so exhausting yeah there's always some cause yeah there's some cause that they're all up in arms about very sensitive people I think people are like really really

Brian Atlasinvested in politics exhausting it's exhausting um and they may be righteous in their political positions but it's like

Brian Atlasfor a partner I don't want someone who's like really invested in politics I don't consider myself super invest in politics I don't think I'd want yeah their Direction whether she's like super

Brian Atlasliberal super conservative it's like yeah I don't know anyways um okay we have uh sticks and Bones here again hey thanks for the hundred haha sorry to be super chatting so much hey uh I don't I do not object man I appreciate your

Brian Atlaspatronage but general question ladies I'm single and I haven't dated anyone in about a year I'm trying to get back out there and these dating apps are killing me so what's some recommendations on how

Julia Lynn Sandovalto improve my odds I mean that's a pretty general question but um Jim get your money up please let me start go ahead marketing nowadays is everything which

Julia Lynn Sandovalmeans how you step out of the house is so important the way you carry yourself how you approach someone body language but also how what do you have to offer the female

Julia Lynn Sandovalbecause the more you start focusing on that too the more confident you will also be in situations where you can assert like more of an alpha I guess energy it's like a confidence you know if you know

Julia Lynn Sandovalwhat you have you get what I mean like you attract like things yeah like if you if you know you have like value or you feel like you're valuable then you're gonna

Bella (valarama TV)naturally communicate with somebody and hold yourself in a confident light and that's attractive anybody else have a uh yeah answer to that so I think again like uh appearances matter because that's the

Bella (valarama TV)first judgment you're gonna make is the appearance so make sure uh you know your outfits are clean um well fitted you're physically active groomed well uh when it comes to like online dating make sure your profile

Bella (valarama TV)picture is actually well because a lot of guys have really bad profile pictures and you're gonna get swiped left and then it's very important to learn how to talk to women I feel like a lot of guys

Bella (valarama TV)cannot talk to women and like keep an eye contact which is kind of a demonstration of lack of confidence you have to make sure to keep it eye contact with people so I would try to work on those I feel like easier said than done

Brian Atlasyou know what's really gangster though never looking at a woman to be honest that is just be like just look at her tits you're not even

Brian Atlaswork you're not even worthy of me looking at you that's the most okay if you're not looking at me so you're misreading it the guys that are scared to scared to make eye contact they're

Brian Atlasactually they just they're so confident they're staring at the table the table is that are a threats I will only glance at

Bella (valarama TV)someone who's a threat to me the table is a threat to you

Brian AtlasI'm so confident I need I need not look at who I'm talking to because I can do my Aikido makes sense totally

Brian Atlasworked anybody else on that soup chatter and but he uh advice I mean I think the big one just get fit get in the gym get your money up exactly those are those are some

Victoriathings within your control that you can work on I feel like you can just talk to people too like sewing poop as much emphasis on like yeah to talk to girls in a certain way I mean just she's a

Elizabethhuman yeah talk to her like she's your bro exactly I feel like always be on dating apps yeah I think the best thing is just ask her questions and let her do the talking yeah if you're interested then ask a question back you know that's how you contend your conversation

Elizabethconversation I feel like guys feel like they have to raise a girl up all the time like it's not like that you mean sometimes

Julia Lynn Sandovalbut don't say anything yeah but if you ask if you have Riz you are 99 sure like 100 you are going to get the girl then if you don't have her is that is just a

Julia Lynn Sandovalfact and I think everyone can agree with that if you have Riz the girl is going to be looking what would you define what's wrong

Bella (valarama TV)yeah it's a charismatic but that comes from from like confidence and stuff I like a man who knows but confidence isn't like the only thing

Brian Atlasyou know what I mean yeah but are you gonna date an insecure man are you attracted to that no not being sick you're a super important yeah yeah you could also go to never mind I was gonna say you could become a passport bro too um because you said you've been single

Julia Lynn Sandovalfor a year you haven't dated anyone in about a year yo Brian you are

Brian Atlasif you're struggling to find to and you're not it's not clear if you've been trying to uh find somebody but you know if you're struggling in the marketplace

Brian Atlasin the U.S maybe think about Latin America think about you know uh East Asian countries you know go to where you are

Bella (valarama TV)appreciated you know also you could potentially lower your standards a little bit make them a little bit more realistic no shoot for the stars go for your goals

SadieI believe in you I would just put down the dating apps and just go outside true like go outside touch grass hang out with friends

TTS Readerget in my belly I want my baby back baby back baby back baby back baby back ribs I want my baby back baby back baby back

Sadiebaby back baby back ribs Chili's baby back ribs all right thank you fat Pastor that's thank you um you were saying touch grass go outside go to the yeah like you said you go to the gym you probably can meet a

Brian Atlaswoman at the gym okay you'll probably meet someone at work don't do the gym so so you don't do the job yeah your recommendation to him is to like just go and like approach a girl out in public

Sadieabsolutely yeah let's I think so many stories like we met on Tinder it's like okay that's not the gym how sweet like I don't I don't think well yeah the gym is

Brian Atlasthe worst place I wouldn't I wouldn't approach a girl at the gym just because it's like you're there for to put in work to work out like I think a lot of people I mean look if

Julia Lynn Sandovalyou're really feeling her then no if you got it like that and you're hot do it if you like if you're lacking in the confidence and you don't know if you can don't just don't oh yeah just if there's any doubts like then it's just gonna be awesome yeah it's gonna be

Sadieawkward like as if you see them again it's just like yeah I don't know there's just so many places to meet people like if you're in like 20s you would go to like a bar a party like anything if

Bella (valarama TV)you're older go on Facebook group like Facebook groups and like see where the parties are at for like 30 year olds yeah just go make some friends there's going to be girls there like it's going to give you confidence it's okay I want

Brian Atlasto do a test so you said like just go out hit like pick up a girl out in the real in the streets uh so I want you to try to pick me up I'm going to pretend to be a chick you would be a dude let's

Brian Atlasdo it oh gosh my name's Brianna or actually here okay you pick what's the context that we're

Brian Atlasmeeting where where what's the context the park okay I'm so I'm at the park what what am I doing am I just like uh laying on them

Sadieyeah you're reading um a book on the bench okay cute and I never claimed to have rizz guys but uh

Sadiego forward is the seat taken that's cute I mean it's a good start there's am I on the grass oh there's a bench there's a bench you're on a bench reading a book

Brian Atlasum or like ass like can I say sure that's so no reasonable question let me try oh you want to raise me up yeah I do okay okay what's the context

Brian AtlasPark I'm at the park bench reading some romantic books okay I'm a social I'm reading Karl Marx oh my God okay okay I'm gonna walk by you and I'm gonna

Julia Lynn Sandovalliterally compliment your shoes I'm gonna talk to you about your shoes because you're a guy guys love sneakers the sneaker game whatever no no but I'm the chick you're the dude

Julia Lynn Sandovalthe girl oh shoot this is so hard that's what I mean I got it are you gonna go here you go I'll take it off to you go ahead okay you know

Taylorum can I sit here I couldn't help but notice from across the park your smile's very beautiful

Bella (valarama TV)girls have no games I got this I'm not even gonna try okay do my okay is this seat open do you mind if I sit here no bro there's a what why

Brian Atlasdo we have to do this again wait wait let's start again okay go again go again uh Excuse Me Miss uh do you mind if I sit here yes

Brian Atlasum uh say just say hold on let me just let me just get my answer this this is what a girl would say she'd be like uh there's like a seat over there

Brian Atlaslet's move on hey in in the in the men's bathroom if there's three urinals you don't go up to

Brian Atlasthe urine like you don't take the urinal next to another dude there has to be a like if there's other uh benches at the park you can't go up to the girl be like oh my God it's so crowded in the park

Julia Lynn Sandovalit's obvious that I actually interested in you that's why I said can I sit next to me that's what I like to do is to keep it nonchalant and be like yeah I love that

Julia Lynn Sandovallike I love that shirt I would just stop talking to you about your book okay fine I'll come along I'll play along okay so uh my name is Bella

Bella (valarama TV)what's your name oh it's Brianna nice to meet you oh what book are you reading Karl Marx what is it about yeah communism oh do you mind if I like maybe grab your coffee and then we could talk

Taylorabout this book no I feel very interesting after all if after like that short of time they're asking to grab I think it's too quickly yeah I'll give you I'll give you my actual rebuttal I'll be like okay

Brian Atlasum I don't know I'm just kind of even like enjoying my communist reading session here can you uh I don't even know you whatever oh well you know what that's okay have a great day and then I'm just gonna go away no

Julia Lynn Sandovalthat's because on the confidence okay go ahead okay try I'm gonna you're wearing a green shirt or something I don't know okay hey I love that green shirt that's so something I don't know just be natural

Julia Lynn Sandovaloh thank you yeah uh what's your name Brianna Brianna oh nice for you I'm I'm a daddy

Brian Atlaswhere are you from you can't actually say if you said your dad okay hi I'm Tim actually that I feel like a girl might laugh at that she probably would that could be fun

Julia Lynn SandovalBrianna where are you from uh Vermont Vermont wow I've never been over there what's it like that's boring really yeah I'm from Colorado the mountains oh my God the

Julia Lynn Sandovalsnow let me tell you horrible do you like La how long have you been living here I just I just missed out here I think that's the way

Julia Lynn Sandovalare you seeing are you seeing anybody yet am I seeing anybody yeah oh you know I'm like just you know chilling reading your books well I think you're beautiful and I

Julia Lynn Sandovalwould love to take you out nothing just to hang out get to know each other maybe go get dinner on me obviously love to treat you to whatever you want oh I yeah

Julia Lynn SandovalI guess we could do dinner let's go

Victoriaactually no that's not true it might not necessarily be a rejection because she may be trying to see what you're about because I've done that before you kind of use the Instagram as

Brian Atlaslike a filter yeah yeah I think so honestly though I think that the the way the the trajectory of that conversation I think it moved way too quick there wasn't any like banter I don't think there was any like

Julia Lynn Sandovalit's well but she's reading a book like you don't you don't want to take away first that's annoying well she already like put it down to talk to you in the first place like so she's already pulling in that and then shoot yourself here's why okay cool you want to make

Julia Lynn Sandovalsure she thinks about you because if it's short and sweet she's thinking about you but don't make her uncomfortable you're not gonna go get a coffee right away sure okay right you don't want to do something that I mean yeah

Brian AtlasI've given you I've given you the Instagram uh now what so so it's later on in the day what what do you do you're gonna wait you do not slide in immediately you wait till the next day

Julia Lynn Sandovalbecause guess why you're busy you're a man of high value you got going on yeah and you're gonna say hey what are you doing this Saturday I'd love to take you

Sadieto dinner and then or don't worry too strong and yeah and he asked me to like hang out and then he didn't text me

Julia Lynn SandovalI'd be like is your goal to like get laid no for me I like it when the guy

Julia Lynn Sandovalno that's not it no my goal no I mean my goal is okay let's go back and forth with the actual messages on Instagram so you say what either way to get laid or

Julia Lynn Sandovalto get to know a girl the beginning is still the beginning is still the same whether you want to get later get to know the girl it's still the same sure 100 so that will work every time okay so

Julia Lynn Sandovalso you wait a day then you slide in what do you send um something cute something cute and funny about the book so did you finish you finish something funny

Julia Lynn Sandovalhere let's just role play it yeah okay role play you don't have to just go ahead so what's your message you finished that book yet are you still glued to that book LOL something cute fun fun I actually really like so who did

Bella (valarama TV)that book yeah yeah [Laughter] um that sounds like a girl who's not interested if you're giving such a short

Bella (valarama TV)answer it's like yeah yeah what are you saying what's that book that from Robin D'Angelo about it's like something about white privilege yeah I'm reading a book on

Julia Lynn Sandovalwhite privilege now Jesus yes can you just give me a normal okay yes uh I finished the book it was wonderful how are you

Julia Lynn Sandovaloh um I'm gonna say you said I finished the book it was wonderful what'd you say yeah how are you um

Brian Atlasif this was like a conversation this is like zero risk no words we're messaging so I have time Brian okay I'd say you're trying to get me out on a

Julia Lynn Sandovaldate right okay get me out on the date go um what would be wonderful is it what would be water no don't say that I'd say oh

Julia Lynn Sandovalthat's something just simple oh that's uh hold on hold on um um do it hold it can you lower the volume

Julia Lynn Sandovaljust do it don't let your dreams be dreams yesterday you said tomorrow so just do it I love that guy um something you need you need to say

Julia Lynn Sandovalsomething a little flirty with her but not too flirty so okay but then you okay but that was a good start yeah it's really good hey I was committed okay I was committed to this

Brian Atlaswhat were you gonna say though okay here let's get some chats and okay we got Matt jams 89 hey thank you man uh Brian is so mod is saying he's in the high value man he actually saved me from

Brian Atlasa shark attack before some girls left out the fish we had caught that day and then tracked to the shark Brian out ran out of the boat cabin then scared the shark off 11 out of 10. hey Matt jams uh

Brian Atlas89 thank you very much appreciate it oh one other quality I appreciate in women is Modesty I like modesty I like because I like to I try to be modest okay we have ex Falco here uh thank you

Brian Atlasfor the uh donation man appreciate a wonderful stream tonight guys good to see these girls have their head on their shoulders please be careful to not go too far in the of route as to not disrespect yourself and your future

Brian Atlasfamily perception is everything in reputation and Legacy at last work based okay good times x Falco thank you for that

Julia Lynn Sandovaldo you guys have a response to that or not really yeah thank you of course draw your boundaries ladies and always stick to them exactly wait we have yourself out there a little update here from

Brian Atlasum sticks and bones he says

Brian Atlasmy problem is that I live in Japan I work for the military been here for eight years now but the dating scene be rough out here I'm a 511 dude covered in ink I go out a decent amount I've gone

Brian Atlason some dates work out five times a week bro you're already in Japan are you you're 5 11 how are you not just like killing it dude well the tattoos in

Brian AtlasJapan are considered part of the uh the mafia not the mafia but for Native Japanese but he's honestly basically are you American are you American I don't think he's like in the Japanese

Julia Lynn Sandovalmilitary sticks and Bones slide into some DMS on Instagram honestly I'm not gonna lie I think that's gonna be your best bet what what is the term looking out for him what's that what's not

Bella (valarama TV)working out for him yeah clarify um are you in the U.S military I assume you are but no the ink is still a problem because like sometimes when you go to public places you still have to cover it up in Japan it's a cultural I

Bella (valarama TV)thought it was I thought that was changing though no I was just in Japan and they're like that yeah it's still pretty yeah okay and um I don't know I might be wrong but I feel like um when it comes to certain

Bella (valarama TV)Eastern Asian countries and stuff like that they actually would like to date like a Japanese guy in my opinion I like uh they like to stay Within their own what's it called Gaijin are

Brian Atlasyou a is he a it's I think that's the term Gaijin what does that mean a Gaijin is like isn't that what like uh the Japanese will call like uh a foreigner

Brian AtlasGaijin that's what they call the form like typically American foreigners I think am I is it is that wrong to say ganji I don't know

Brian Atlasyou're the only one wait guys hold on am I mean Foreigner or Outsider in practice

Brian AtlasGaijin are commonly used to refer to refer to foreigners of non-east Asian ethnicities Gaijin I don't know if I'm pronouncing it right

Brian Atlasyeah somebody also brought up and like no term for foreigners so maybe I don't know you gotta find some I'm pretty sure there's like Japanese women that are like Gaijin Hunters but

Bella (valarama TV)uh somebody brought up an interesting point hopefully you're actually able to like speak in Japanese like speak Japanese and like communicate with them because that's important I mean they speak I don't speak any Japanese and everyone was like super eager to

Brian Atlaspractice their English but I feel like if you're going on a date like I think it's a little important wait sticks and bones are you in like some remote like small population area of Japan

Julia Lynn SandovalI don't know are there U.S military bases and also how long if you know if you're gonna be are you gonna be in Japan this whole time like why don't you start dming girls back where you're gonna be going

Julia Lynn Sandovalto like or are you out in Japan forever like what's the vibe I don't know in the base like slide into some girls DMS back in Colorado if that's where you're headed

Brian Atlasback to you know true okay we have uh Adam Collins here you say that and it works up front meeting in the streets which works short term however girls get sketched out by no social media

Julia Lynn Sandovalsee like we want it like investigate a little we're a little crazy through the gift of the guy who has like absolutely no social media presidency something's wrong no not that something's not wrong but it's like

Julia Lynn Sandovalwe're it's like why we want to know a little bit more about you it's a little too the unknown is very he's like a technical for a lot of people well that's something like why why don't you have they want to do it if that's the

Taylorreason then that's not necessarily a bad thing but if they got some like baggage then I mean they want to do a little bit where are they hiding or what if they're hiding yeah they actually have a girlfriend see we just want to see The

Brian AtlasVibes word okay we have uh TJ King hey thank you for the 50 man ladies would you smash Henry Cavill if he approached you with a date oh my God

Brian Atlasoh my gosh dressing as The Witcher can you find some photos of uh potential James Bond no I don't see it I think he is going to be James Bond I mean I can't believe

Brian Atlasthat they say that he's too old to be Superman it's just yeah it seems crazy to me by the way sticks and Bones I don't know if you uh if you're still in the chat if you've hit the uh because sometimes there's a maximum oh yeah sticks you might have hit the uh

Brian AtlasI don't know if you hit the max actually but if you uh I think on YouTube there's a 500 limit for soup chats so you may have to if you want to get your message in you may have to do it through uh

Brian Atlasstream labs uh that's Henry Cavill casual I can't pronounce anything um okay so why what's ladies wise with

Julia Lynn SandovalThe Witcher I mean the just here show of hand show of hands who here would accept a date from Henry Cavill I mean like a picture of what he looks like right now because there's like yeah he

Julia Lynn Sandovalplays World of Warcraft by the way hmm hello what do you mean the picture those were pictures of him yeah I didn't get a good look um please all right pull it up again really quick uh

Julia Lynn Sandovalpick one that's like looks like him right now probably that I mean he Cavill don't like this is like 700 different looks like pick one yeah the top one I don't

Brian Atlasknow who is who scroll down

Brian Atlasand like what's the body looking like right now he's oh my gosh all right okay we have uh sticks and Bones I'm American U.S military and issue TBH is that most people nowadays

Brian Atlasaren't looking for anything serious nowadays hookup culture is huge out here now I live about an hour away from Tokyo I'm moving from Japan next year okay he's an hour from Tokyo so he's like is

Brian Atlasit would that be the suburbs maybe of Tokyo I'm not super familiar with uh with uh Japan but uh well it looks like someone said Japan is easy in the chat I know I'm not supposed to no it's kind of

Bella (valarama TV)interesting how he says I thought Japan was more traditional no it's not even that but people are not having sex in Japan like their birth rates are going really down because they're just not having sex and so I'm kind of interested

Bella (valarama TV)that he said the hookup culture is huge because I would have thought it was the opposite I would have thought that there would be a lot more single women out there you know already yeah I agree to whatever because men don't want to have

Julia Lynn Sandovalsex anymore so that's kind of interesting is there well there's Japanese tender that's what you're saying for sure yeah that's your best hookup culture is huge eye and maybe try to get a FaceTime in before you meet up

Victoriawell sticks and bones are you are you not trying to hook up with some Japanese women what's going on you don't want to hook up you want a relationship he wants a wife but he's leaving in a

Brian Atlasyear isn't it the case though that like people have to work a lot in Japan like both men and women are like work a ton and so they don't have a lot of time time or something I mean like honestly bro you're gonna have to like ride it

Bella (valarama TV)out and wait till you move they have a very high rate of falling asleep dead because of working so much yeah good very interesting culture uh

Julia Lynn Sandovaldo you think like hook up culture will like ever go away or no that no the cat is out of the bag on that I think no this guy should actually look look wherever you're gonna move back to find girls and just like you know have a

Brian Atlaslittle bit of a roster and then when you move back you can meet if they're still like single you can meet up with them I find that tough though that's like because a lot of people say like a lot of women in a lot of Asian countries

Brian Atlastend to lean more traditional so I don't know it's just kind of surprising that you're struggling in Japan when a lot of people say well if you're struggling in the Western countries go to

Brian Atlasan Asian country so uh yeah I don't know but uh rip Rip's in the chat for our boy sticks and Bones he's 511 ripped his he's

Brian Atlasa Giga Chad and he's struggling in Japan if there's any Japanese ladies any Japanese ladies watching his DMS sticks and Bones DMS are open

Brian Atlasum yeah maybe uh I don't know guaranteed in a week from now you'll already I think you gotta go on the tear dude you gotta hit you got to do the dating apps you gotta go to social Gatherings you gotta meet you're

Brian Atlasprobably not putting go approach hurt as you think approach girls have you been on the dating apps have you what have you tried what have you tried because uh if you're not trying various Avenues

Brian Atlasthen you know we have uh the cast man hey thank you man I'm an American who lives in Japan yo by the way guys I might go to Japan at some point so uh

Brian Atlasthat's a visit I've never been so uh maybe I can I'll meet up with you guys a wingman for you I'm a good Wing man okay that's cute okay the cast man I'm an American who lives in Japan it's

Brian Atlasit's extremely hard to date Japanese women if you don't speak Japanese well yeah that could be a thing um most people don't speak English okay yes Tinder is in Japan but you won't get any matches if you don't speak Japanese

Brian Atlasokay that's a good point yeah so you probably I mean if you're in a foreign country uh especially like I think in Japan my understanding is like there there are some like European countries where a lot

Brian Atlasof them will speak English like the Netherlands Scandinavian countries a lot of them will like very even though it's not the primary language like they speak English very proficiently or fluently in

Julia Lynn SandovalJapan like you got to speak Japanese most likely so uh so basically you gotta learn Japanese son sticks and bones do you speak Japanese polyamorous relationship when you're dating three people or more

Brian Atlasthan one it's gonna be you your Japanese girl and Google translate that's what you're about to be in but dude can you find in the major cities can't you find like Gaijin

VictoriaHunters it's like natives the the maybe he needs to start his own dating service where he can help his other like other people from outside of

Brian AtlasJapan I mean you could say he could try to date the uh fellow American U.S soldiers they're women but I've not heard good things about that okay

Brian Atlasum so uh yeah good times okay we have Let's see we have Curtis here when I was in oh what's there's a lot of people tuning in from Japan right about now oh when I was

Brian Atlasin Okinawa in the Marine Corps I wasn't having much luck with the Japanese chicks but then I took two semesters of Japanese all of a sudden I was slaying Japanese chicks got so good

Brian Atlasthat the girl from Tokyo would fly down to visit me weekly and he was on Okinawa which was is an island um in Japan so bro you got yeah you probably gotta

Brian Atlaslearn Japanese exactly did he did stick say he's been in Japan for eight years he said he's in the military for eight years okay military yeah I think you gotta learn the language I mean I think that it's a hard language to learn though I

Brian Atlasthink so uh okay good luck with that thank you Curtis for that uh donation okay we have I think that's it for the chats um uh we should try to wrap up here pretty soon so uh before before

Brian Atlasthat anyone any final thoughts on anything specifically Japan or anything if you anything you wanted to uh touch on or get off your chest before we wrap

Brian AtlasBella who's Bella me yeah you you said that your ex-boyfriend plotted to kill your current what the yes

Bella (valarama TV)and then they're friends now no what so um I used to date this guy and uh he was a very interesting guy he was

Bella (valarama TV)International Chinese guy actually I met him in college and we dated and he was uh one of my serious first relationship boyfriends and I broke up with him

Bella (valarama TV)um but before I broke up uh he was going through some stuff so I suggest that hey you know what why don't you write down things like I don't know in your diary or whatever um so uh he did

Bella (valarama TV)um once I completely broke up with him and I found his diary I read it and he said that he would stop my next boyfriend in the eye yeah good times he

Bella (valarama TV)didn't yeah it's sweet it's a passionate love just told you so much like no yeah he's a guy you don't want other people to see you yeah no he's good he's married like

Brian Atlashe's he seems happy yeah yeah somebody married him so it's good anyone else any final thoughts any last minute topics you'd like to touch on before we wrap up here

Brian AtlasI don't think so I'm thinking word you said you I think you wanted to touch on uh modern dating has skewed our ideas of what a human connection relationship is I've talked to friends who have said

Brian Atlasthat is overwhelming risky and exhausting and it seems to have gone in this way from hookup culture definitely

Sadieyou don't know now if hooking up like how are you going to go into a relationship okay let me start over modern dating is hard now because I

Sadiethink everyone just wants to hook up they like there's like why have one if you could have five that's I think very big and what people are thinking now so

Sadiethey don't want to date it's harder to date I think I feel like it's hard yeah like finding someone that wants commitment yeah it's hard yeah so yeah I think there's a lot very very hard yeah I think there's a lot of issues with the

Bella (valarama TV)hookup culture um one is people are not very honest and self-aware as to what their intentions are two I think there is an issue with consent when it comes to hookups

Bella (valarama TV)sometimes you know uh we might say one thing but then do another thing and then it there's an issue with that for example um you know a girl might say hey um

Bella (valarama TV)let's hang out but we're not gonna sleep together but then you guys hang out and then you do end up sleeping but it's like you said No at first and then you change your opinion so I think there's a

Bella (valarama TV)lot of like issues with how you phrase things and with consent specifically and uh yeah I just think we just lost a human touch to it yeah and I also feel like people are more business focused

Taylorthese days um so they're not really looking for relationships they're looking to further their career and that gets in the way oh that's interesting point yeah

TTS Readeras a to get ahead kind of thing I think that always existed though yeah also expectations now lay Grossman donated 100 I'm gonna have to head down

TTS Readerthere and I will rain down an ungodly Firestorm upon you you're gonna have to call the United Nations and get a binding resolution to

Brian Atlaskeep me from destroying you I am talking Scorch turf um okay let's uh less gross man okay thank you very much talking to you

Brian Atlasthat's passion that's hard that yeah that is um that is something for sure that was certainly a choice that was that was okay thank you less

Brian Atlasgrossful that was that was beautiful okay um did you have a final thought on anything before we wrap up from going for a minute

Brian Atlasum follow me on Instagram at Julia Lynn Sandoval link is in the Bible yeah okay onlyvic.com let's call Taylor yeah I think that's it I mean the only uh

Brian Atlaswe've probably gone pretty long here uh red flags you know what we could do maybe I'll do uh if any of you want to stick around I'll do like a 20 30 minute after show

Brian Atlasthat's when we like turn the lights down so uh maybe we can do that but uh maybe um turn all the lights down and then what no it's like

Brian Atlasa what it's like you know turn off the lights it's like more it's like mood lighting right it's mood lighting it's like the

Taylorafter show it's like girls here and then wants to turn down the lights

Brian Atlasin GTA it's a yellow card for you okay cool um let's see here

Brian Atlasanyone read Flags let's go over on the table uh red flags any red flags that that either that you have or that are red flags for you in the

TaylorI don't like sushi that's a red flag for okay yeah a lot of people think it's a red flag I like any Seafood neither Seafood here I'll give one if she's a

Brian Atlasvan lifer if if she's a van lifer that's a red flag what's a van lifer they they live in their van and they like travel around and like I've seen them on dating apps and

Brian Atlaslike you have to understand as a guy if you see a chick who's a van lifer on a dating app and she's like oh I'm in town for two days and she's on the dating app she hooks up with she hooks

Brian Atlasup with a new dude every new city she's in and she uses them for a shower for like a bed oh my God I have one if she has an

Julia Lynn SandovalInstagram but doesn't have an only fans and doesn't have another any other job that you have like spoken with her about and is in a different country every

Julia Lynn Sandovalmonth like sugar daddies yeah it's a sugar daddy thing she's got a job already I'll put it that way yeah yeah no that's not me are you

Bella (valarama TV)calling yourself let's make that life uh for me my personal red flag is again being impatient and I guess for a guy would be just very insecure

Victoriayeah okay anything anybody I'm like when people are like rude to people that like at a restaurant

Victoriaor like just people that you nobody sees you like somebody's rude to weight style like anybody like even though you're out in public and no one sees you or knows

Victoriayou and you have no like benefit from react interacting with that person I think just kindness to all people that you all inter like interact with is sexy and people are just like rude and like

Julia Lynn Sandovalnot kind in general is just like a really big turn off like in general but it's kind of it's kind of mean but it's honest what is it if he's a 10 and he's dating a girl that's a three that's a

Julia Lynn Sandovalred flag there's many reasons why well he's a right I think he's physically a 10 and he's dating a female who's physically a three red flag What If It's Love yeah

Bella (valarama TV)red flag she's probably so nice red flag what do you think is the issue like what do you think what do you think his intentions are I don't know you think it's like a

Julia Lynn Sandovalpower thing I think I think it could be control I think it could be the girl has a wealthy family I think it could be he's broke and she has money I think I think it could be a lot of things but

Julia Lynn Sandovalmen think very logically and also tend to uh be more sexually aggressive than females so that's all um

Brian Atlasdisavow oh been to the offender donated 99 or he's gay it doesn't get guys with an Android red flag would anyone here like would not date a guy because of a phone

Bella (valarama TV)that's weird leave him alone I think it's because maybe apple is associated with like wealth or something like more wealthy people have apple but I think it's the stupid reason wait

Brian Atlasquestions let's say like a guy he's he's risen you up he's running some game and you're into him you're feeling him he's

Bella (valarama TV)about to ask for your number and you're you're would be otherwise prepared to give him your number however when he pulls out his phone it's a flip phone he's got the flip phone oh shoot

Brian Atlascrunch is it just done do you reconsider giving him your number hey I give it to him for the fun of it like I'm gonna look around and see who's

Bella (valarama TV)filming and where the joke is at this point no I feel like it's like it's kind of no one has a flip photo it's the type of guy who's like oh I don't want to participate in societal Norms I want to be unique and different so I'm gonna

Julia Lynn Sandovalhave a flip phone so I don't yeah no I think that's gonna be cringe nobody has no one has a flip phone so this is even happening no one's having a flip phone okay how about this how about this same circumstances

Tayloryou meet but like eventually if like I'm dating that person for a while then I hope I'm the first thing they think about when they wake up and the first thing they think about when they go to sleep yeah that's sweet but but we're talking about red flags so I don't think

Sadiewe're even there yet right because when they don't eat reactions care about their appearance it's kind of a red flag like yeah like if they're going out of the house all the time right now like what's like when nature sounds gross like they don't shake room

Bella (valarama TV)your dress you're fine I'm wearing sweatpants no I feel like like yeah I totally agree with you look I feel like even once you're in a relationship and stuff like that you should never settle down when it comes to your looks you should always

Julia Lynn Sandovallook good for your partner literally comfy life is I have a good one guys who are disrespectful to their moms or to animals red flag um

Julia Lynn Sandovalyeah absolutely definitely yeah I also have another one men who put down other people's views and can't have an open-minded conversation but just immediately knock it down can't even

Bella (valarama TV)listen you talking about me no just because I'm looking at you a little ahead of four hour conversation with us yeah respectful yeah um

Julia Lynn Sandovalanything else oh what do you guys think about if you were to see get into a man's car that you're on a first date with and you see that he has condoms in his middle console is

Victoriathat a red flag for you I feel like if he should be able to see that and know like yeah yeah especially in this heat like at least but it could be good protecting yeah it could be a good thing

Victoriaalso him having that there on the first day is also extremely presumptive yeah maybe you should put them there just in case just in case

Bella (valarama TV)what if he's a Tanner but has an ADHD then I have eight that's me that's not a red flag

Julia Lynn SandovalI love ADHD honestly it keeps the conversation rolling truly Good Times Good Times

Brian Atlasokay I think that's it for the super chats and everything all right sweet guys Okay cool so we're gonna wrap

Brian Atlasup there um guys last call go over to twitch.tv whatever drop us a follow and a prime sub if you have one twitch.tv

Brian Atlaswhatever mods if you can spam in the chat the whole bunch uh yeah like I said if you have Amazon Prime you link it to your Twitch it's a quick free easy way every single month to support the show

Brian Atlasdrop us a prime sub drop us a follow uh yeah and uh go over there moldy thing for the prime refined Randy thing for the prime uh earth king root thing for the follow

Brian AtlasMPL thing for the follow McCain thing for the follow Northern and thanks for the follow really appreciate it guys okay um also hit that like button please on your way out we I we'll do like a 10

Brian Atlasminute 15 minute after show um and uh yeah so actually Elizabeth can you do the after show yeah okay cool um we'll have Elizabeth run the after show um thank you for tuning in tonight guys

Brian Atlasyou could have been anywhere in the world but you were here with me I appreciate that thank you to everyone who so generously and kindly uh super chats donates and supports the show your

Brian Atlaspatronage is uh very much appreciated uh thank you to the wonderful panel I I it was a I think it was a good chill show tonight uh much needed after some

Brian Atlasof our very hectic wait can somebody play the uh Simba uh Sylvania okay um any women who want to be on the

Brian Atlasshow DM at whatever on Instagram we will be live again Tuesday at 7 pm Pacific I have a good panel for us got some interesting guests coming uh and can we

Brian Atlasget some 07s in the chat oh yeah Madison she's just gone for the week uh she will be back uh yeah she's just out of town for uh July 4th so we are doing a July

Brian Atlas4th uh show by the way guys this is a Tuesday so uh if you guys uh finish up your July 4th festivities be sure to tune in on Tuesday 7 PM Pacific we will be live you will probably hear the

Brian Atlasfireworks going off outside of our studio in any case but uh yeah let me see some 07s or oh sevens yeah o7s in the chat hope you guys have a good night we will see you

Brian Atlasnext time good night guys and uh yeah stick around for a few minutes we'll do a 10 to 15 minute after show Eric if you can hit the lights okay cool okay

Bella (valarama TV)after show so what wait what are we doing what's the after show

Bella (valarama TV)yes it's just like what happens behind the scenes

Bella (valarama TV)what president can I open a Prosecco on stream or no because I'm a professional Prosecco opener you're a professional Prosecco yes

Brian Atlasis that allowed okay all right but

Bella (valarama TV)damn I wonder what we're back in just a second I wonder what they're doing right now what's that I wonder what the guys are doing all right let me let me do this as a professional

Taylor[Music] like

Taylorfar away from that

Tayloryeah oh okay they're just watching me open this up hi chat oh

Taylorout of here

Bella (valarama TV)scared me safe not dangerous who wants what what is that you won yeah

Elizabethdo you guys have to drive back no where they're running with me home yeah oh that's we met no you're a good girl I don't drink or

Victoriasmoke I'm not driving you have yeah we have my husband's driving us I'm so boring guys I don't drink or smoke yeah you're holding my coat

Tayloroh this is your cup we know this one no no the Double Cups oh okay okay

Elizabethwhat oh my God oh how do you guys pass the taste can you help me isn't that like bitter like super better really really depends on the Alcohol

Bella (valarama TV)really yeah some wines can be really sweet some can be a little bitter it depends on the grape and if the skin is used let's go should I try once up

Bella (valarama TV)chairs you want to I don't think you would like this one but this is a good try that's a good start it's Prosecco Prosecco is typically a little sweeter it's used as

Bella (valarama TV)a mix typically yes it's Hello Kitty it's princess pops okay

VictoriaI'll get you a cup so they only use one camera for the afternoon night time or they're just taking a break guys I won't drink it don't worry I don't know if I'm supposed

Victoriato move or not yeah it's not an expensive bottle

Studio Staff[Music] oh yeah

Brian Atlaschills oh I literally had a chill during that while we were talking I was like no so you're doing the Harlem Shake yeah I know he's friends with

Sadiechildren

Bella (valarama TV)would demolish this podcast yeah it would be crazy I know I I kind of need to stand too a little bit

Bella (valarama TV)oh my God I am

Bella (valarama TV)zerica would have all of us in tears I don't know the circle likes to use gross as a Content but I like it depends on the energy you give him back who doesn't know zurica

Studio Staffready are you ready wait can you hear me I would try once up for you guys okay

Julia Lynn Sandovalwait can you guys hear me or the microphone's muted can they hear no no they can't hear it yeah okay where did he go where is this guy that has been so sweet this whole

Julia Lynn Sandovalstream no Johnny Johnny even literally like messaging me this entire stream Julia Lynn Julia Lynn over and over and over and over again how do you like it

Bella (valarama TV)how do you like it Where'd you go it's different it was like Johnny something different what does different mean difference yeah like can you guys hear us

Bella (valarama TV)yeah they can hear us Johnny I'm drinking us up yeah they can hear us thank you Jesus yeah

Julia Lynn Sandovalit's like bubbly in the back

Julia Lynn Sandovalokay I tried to say hi to you bye I'll bring Christiana next time bye guys I'll take care of myself guys thank you

Bella (valarama TV)nice to meet you next time ah we can all right yeah

Bella (valarama TV)is it a Pomeranian that is so cute really oh oh they're saying

Bella (valarama TV)there's a CEO good to see you again the dog's name is Bella hola mi amor como estas go ahead

Elizabeththis is Elizabeth I'm going restroom I'll be back foreign

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